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" March is Cerebral Palsy Awareness Month. Don't feel bad if you did not know that. I didn't, either, until someone recently slapped a picture of a green ribbon and a message wishing me a 'Happy CP Awareness Month' on my Facebook page. I always thought March was Women's History Month. "

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" In 2006, I hung out with The Carter Center as they monitored the Palestinian elections. Nobody thought Hamas would win. Hamas did not think Hamas could win. The lion's share of folks I spoke to who were voting for them were not actually voting for Hamas but against Fatah. "

Maysoon Zayid

Win

Voting

" If you're disabled, and you're trying to achieve your dreams, accept the fact right now that you have to work 500 times more than the average bear next to you. Stop bucking for sympathy, put on your titanium legs, and run. "

" Palestinians are Christian, Muslims, atheist, Buddhist - you name it. And the majority I know have nothing against Judaism and everything against Israeli oppression. "

" See, I'm totally fearless. I got my chops in the most, like, dangerous comedy atmosphere. If you can make it in New York, you can really do stand-up anywhere. "

" I am a hardcore foodie, which means I love to eat. I was also born with cerebral palsy, which means I shake all the time - so cooking is not my thing, as I am banned from being around knives and fire. Those who cannot cook, watch, and I am obsessed with cooking shows. "

" With George Bush, I had absolutely no fear that I would ever be silenced. With Donald Trump, I think I could get dragged offstage and have people actually cheer it. I never thought that would happen in America. "

" It is easy to go vegan in Palestine, which is where I quit eating food with a face. The vegetables and spices are one of a kind, and you don't even miss the meat. "

" I'm not here to impose Sharia law, and I'm not here to have a message about disability being inspirational - I'm here to make people laugh. But when I can layer things and make people not only laugh but question, make people not only laugh but be offended... I have to do that. "

" Disability in the Middle East is viewed through a different lens because you're in wartime countries where it's much more mainstream, so I was just never 'other'd. "

Maysoon Zayid

Disability

Lens

" I'm a person who watches TV all the time - all the time; I love TV. And I really think that the media heavily influences how we as a society behave towards each other. And one of the things that I find to be lacking on television are positive images of diversity. "

" We have been sold a Muslim boogeyman. We are buying into it, and we are terrified, and that terror is causing people to lash out at comedians like myself or women wearing hijabs, or anyone who seems to defend equality for Muslims worldwide. "

Maysoon Zayid

Women

Equality

" I was able to walk at 5. I had to be able to walk in order to be mainstreamed into public school. And my father worked day and night to teach me how to walk. And I think what's so amazing about this is the fact that he was told that I would never walk. And he decided that he was going to try. "

" Today, I am a touring standup comic who cannot stand up. Within three minutes, I begin to wilt, lose my balance, and topple over. I can tap dance and run in heels, but I need to use a wheelchair to navigate airports. "

" If you elect a religious party into power, you no longer have a democracy. "

" From fear to bonding with the audience to getting more open - that's what standup is. It humanises you. "

" My parents couldn't afford physical therapy, so they sent me to dancing school. I learned how to dance in heels, which means I can walk in heels. And I'm from Jersey, and we are really concerned with being chic, so if my friends wore heels, so did I. "

Maysoon Zayid

Parents

I Can

" I think there's a backlash against minorities in this country and that part of what caused that was the fact that a black man became president. And a certain portion of the privileged population think their privilege is at stake, and they want it back. "

" Not wearing hijab has seriously, seriously hurt my career. Mass media wants to see a woman in a veil. But I think it helps me because it makes it easier for my audience to relate to me. I'm not the scary 'other' they keep seeing on 'Fox News.' "

Maysoon Zayid

Career

Media

" In the interest of full disclosure, let me state that I hate Hamas. They embody everything that I, as a human being, am fighting against: oppression, religious rule, and patriarchy. They empower Israel while dividing the Palestinians. "

Maysoon Zayid

Empower

Hate

" The Palestine I know is a place where Christians and Muslims are equal. My mother, a Muslim village girl, attended a Catholic girls' school in Ramallah, and my refugee husband spent the Second Intifada side by side with his Christian brothers from Bethlehem. "

" I'm very much inspired by things that anger me. If I see bigotry, stupidity, or injustice on the news, I'm inspired to find a way to make it into something comedic and relatable. Anger inspires me. Stupidity inspires me. My family inspires me. My accountant inspires me. Everything and anything, really. "

" Palestine-Israel is such a ludicrous issue. "

Maysoon Zayid

Ludicrous

Issue

" I am not naive, and I do realize that racism is alive and well in the United States of America. I am also fully aware that when segregation ended, we didn't all live happily ever after. No one can convince me, however, that life in America would be better if blacks and whites had stayed separate and unequal. "

" I think we need a Muslim 'Bachelor' or 'Bachelorette.' I think that's what would be the great equalizer, and that would change everything. "

" I spent my summers in a war zone because my parents were afraid that if we didn't go back to Palestine every single summer, we'd grow up to be Madonna. "

" When I ask people what they think of when they hear the term 'cerebral palsy,' I usually get one of two responses. They either think of a smiling, crumpled child in a wheelchair on a poster or commercials on late night TV with lawyers enticing parents of CP kids to sue the pants off their obstetrician. "

" I have to tell you, it's very boring, but before I did yoga, I was a stand-up comedian who can't stand up. And now I can stand on my head. "

" The most obvious thing I do is I don't wear a burqa, and I'm definitely not oppressed. Plus, I'm quite obviously an independent thinker, which means as soon as I walk on stage, I dispel a lot of those stereotypes. "

" I believe very deeply in my soul that God paired me and my father purposely and that he knew that my father would give me the strength to be a person with disability that was proud, always held her head high, and was never, ever bitter. "

Maysoon Zayid

Father

Proud

" I think religion is very personal. I definitely identify as Muslim. I consider myself practicing, but I don't think people who observe me from the outside would think of me as devout, and that doesn't bother me because one of the beauties of Islam is the fact that it is personal: you read the Koran, and what you believe is what you believe. "