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" We should send a load of bad celebrities to colonise Mars. They would have to mate in space, and then their children would be sent back to Earth in 50 years' time. "

Julian Barratt

Space

Time

Earth

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" I find the pressure to be funny when you're being interviewed live - quite intense. "

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" I can act with either eye, but you've got to be twice as good as an actor to act with one eye. You need to put all your emotions just through one eye and really punch it out of that eye. I found it quite difficult to do at first, and then I found a technique that allowed me to act with one eye, which I patented. "

Julian Barratt

Eye

Need

" We did have that, in the background of the character and the show, 'Mindhorn,' set on the Isle of Man, that every episode they would have to mention the temperate microclimate of the Isle of Man. "

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" I was going to be a jazz-fusion guitarist. I came to London at one point with my mate, and we were going to make it. We spent three days there and went back home to our mummies. "

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" Sport doesn't do anything for me. And I don't do anything for it. "

Julian Barratt

Sport

Anything

" For me, there's no dichotomy between being shy or a performer, because I think it's more a way of slightly presenting a version of things to the world. "

Julian Barratt

Think

" Sometimes, you write things that sound really great when you're at home but don't work when you shine the light of an audience on them. Great writing and live writing are two separate things. "

" Me and Noel went to HBO once and pitched this really ludicrous idea about us driving around in a haunted car, and they just stared at us. Literally stared at us! It was awful. Luckily, we were together, so we could laugh about it, but if we were on our own, it would have been one of the worst moments ever. "

Julian Barratt

Together

Moments

" Pain - that is what life is about, isn't it? Suffering with moments of reprieve. "

" Writing can make you feel a bit psychotic. You create a world, and you're sitting inside it all day long, talking to people who are not really there. "