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All Quotes by author - P. G. Wodehouse

" Every author really wants to have letters printed in the papers. Unable to make the grade, he drops down a rung of the ladder and writes novels. "

" Few of them were to be trusted within reach of a trowel and a pile of bricks. "

" Flowers are happy things. "

" Golf... is the infallible test. The man who can go into a patch of rough alone, with the knowledge that only God is watching him, and play his ball where it lies, is the man who will serve you faithfully and well. "

" Golf, like measles, should be caught young. "

" Has anybody ever seen a dramatic critic in the daytime? Of course not. They come out after dark, up to no good. "

" Her pupils were at once her salvation and her despair. They gave her the means of supporting life, but they made life hardly worth supporting. "

" He was a tubby little chap who looked as if he had been poured into his clothes and had forgotten to say 'when!' "

" He was white and shaken, like a dry martini. "

" I could see that, if not actually disgruntled, he was far from being gruntled. "

" I just sit at a typewriter and curse a bit. "

" I know I was writing stories when I was five. I don't know what I did before that. Just loafed I suppose. "

" It is a good rule in life never to apologize. The right sort of people do not want apologies, and the wrong sort take a mean advantage of them. "

" It was my Uncle George who discovered that alcohol was a food well in advance of modern medical thought. "

" Memories are like mulligatawny soup in a cheap restaurant. It is best not to stir them. "

" She had a penetrating sort of laugh. Rather like a train going into a tunnel. "

" Success comes to a writer as a rule, so gradually that it is always something of a shock to him to look back and realize the heights to which he has climbed. "

" Sudden success in golf is like the sudden acquisition of wealth. It is apt to unsettle and deteriorate the character. "

" The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun. "

" The least thing upset him on the links. He missed short putts because of the uproar of the butterflies in the adjoining meadows. "

" There is only one cure for gray hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine. "

" To find a man's true character, play golf with him. "

" Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum. "

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