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" Being all about me is not a good thing - I don't care what 1978 tried to say - because as long as you mostly think about yourself, you're not going to be a wonderful person. You're just not. "

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" Somehow, married or single, we'd rather anesthetize ourselves with love substitutes than go for the real thing, because let's face it: The real thing is pretty scary. "

Tracy McMillan

Face

Single

Scary

" The deal is: most men just want to marry someone who is nice to them. "

" I feel that as long as you're honest, you have the opportunity to grow. It's when you shut down, go into denial, and try to start hiding things from yourself and others, that's when you lock in certain behaviors and attitudes that keep you stuck. "

" All of us, consciously or unconsciously, set out to have the best possible love life. Valentine's Day simply shines a light on the degree to which that didn't - or hasn't yet - materialized. "

" Yes, I have 'failed' at marriage - a lot. "

" I think every woman has this point in her life where she's like, 'I have a great job, great outfits and great friends, but something's missing.' "

" Being in a relationship is a hard, painful slog at least once a week, maybe more often - especially if you have a lot of defenses to let down, or if your parents didn't know how to love you very well. "

" Relationships are like the world's most intense yoga! It's a daily practice. "

" I'm a blunt person, not mean-spirited. I come from a place of love, but I'm interested in being real. "

" Sometime between when the Summer of Love ended and the Summer of Sam began, America became a nation of cynics about love. "

" Women blame men for their own singlehood. "

" I've been standing at water coolers for the past thirty years talking to women about their love lives, and here's what I've learned: Eventually, most women I know want to be partnered. "

" I'm the straight-talking woman in your life who is going to be really honest with you, but come from a place of love. I'm not talking down to you; I do this from my heart. "

" Ask anyone who has been in a love relationship for a while: nothing is perfect. "

" Rather than diminishing the idea of 'truly needing' a relationship - and trying to deny it, shame it, or talk ourselves out of it - why not just celebrate it? It's exactly what the world needs. "

" I was, for some reason, born knowing how to get married. "

" People who find that they have a lot of drama in their relationships need to allow themselves to get 'bored'. At first, it will feel excruciating, and they may find themselves confronting a very real fear underneath all that drama: being truly close and therefore vulnerable to another human being. "

" I talk to women for a living. It's pretty much what I do with my day. "

" When relationships don't work out, it doesn't mean you're a bad person, it just means you weren't meant to be together. "

" Here's the thing: you're not really ready for love until you have enough self-respect that if you met your exact self, but in a guy, you would totally, completely, absolutely want to be with him. "

" You can't trick The Universe - it's like Santa Claus that way. "

" Because I was a television writer for many years, I write very conversationally. I put things straight, and with a lot of humor. "

" We have this false idea in our culture that if you haven't made it by 30, then you're never going to do anything interesting. My 40s have been the most incredible time of my life. "

" Work is a different type of pursuit than relationships. You can't take the skills that you know that have gotten you into that great school or into that great job and apply them to your relationships. "

" Caring - about people, about things, about life - is an act of maturity. "

" Though it's safe to say there are a whole lotta American gals who agree with the core ideals of feminism, they are somehow nevertheless watching 'Say Yes to the Dress' by the millions. "

" If I had an office job, I'd probably be doing the exact same thing I'm doing on television: hanging out by the water cooler and talking to co-workers about their relationships. "

" Lots of people feel more alive when they're riding a roller-coaster relationship. But while this might be fun for a while, it can't possibly last. "

" I think of masculine and feminine energy like two sides to a battery. There's a plus side and a minus side, and in order to make something turn on, you need to have opposites touching. It's the same in relationships. "

" For every year past the age of 27, you need to take another step toward commitment somewhere in your life. Instead of freelancing, you get a staff job. Instead of renting, you buy. Fine, instead of couch-surfing, you rent. "