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" You can't trick The Universe - it's like Santa Claus that way. "
Tracy McMillan
Santa
You
Trick
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" Because I was a television writer for many years, I write very conversationally. I put things straight, and with a lot of humor. "
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" Yes, I have 'failed' at marriage - a lot. "
Tracy McMillan
Failed
Yes
Marriage
" Is our desire for partnership just an evolutionary remainder, a Togetherness Delusion, where millions of women only think they need a relationship to be truly happy? Maybe. But you know what? That's fine with me. "
Tracy McMillan
Women
Relationship
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" Women with low self-esteem love bad boys. Women who have work to do love bad boys. Women who love themselves love good men. "
Tracy McMillan
Women
Bad
Men
" I think of masculine and feminine energy like two sides to a battery. There's a plus side and a minus side, and in order to make something turn on, you need to have opposites touching. It's the same in relationships. "
Tracy McMillan
Need
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" People who find that they have a lot of drama in their relationships need to allow themselves to get 'bored'. At first, it will feel excruciating, and they may find themselves confronting a very real fear underneath all that drama: being truly close and therefore vulnerable to another human being. "
Tracy McMillan
Feel
People
Drama
" If you're not married, chances are you think a lot about you. "
Tracy McMillan
You
Chances
Lot
" When relationships don't work out, it doesn't mean you're a bad person, it just means you weren't meant to be together. "
Tracy McMillan
Relationships
Bad
You
" Being in a relationship is a hard, painful slog at least once a week, maybe more often - especially if you have a lot of defenses to let down, or if your parents didn't know how to love you very well. "
Tracy McMillan
Parents
Week
Relationship
" I'm the straight-talking woman in your life who is going to be really honest with you, but come from a place of love. I'm not talking down to you; I do this from my heart. "
Tracy McMillan
Heart
Woman
You
" I feel that as long as you're honest, you have the opportunity to grow. It's when you shut down, go into denial, and try to start hiding things from yourself and others, that's when you lock in certain behaviors and attitudes that keep you stuck. "
Tracy McMillan
Opportunity
Yourself
You
" A sure-fire way to know you're crazy is if more than one person has told you you'd be great on a reality show - and you agree with them. "
Tracy McMillan
You
Person
Reality
" For every year past the age of 27, you need to take another step toward commitment somewhere in your life. Instead of freelancing, you get a staff job. Instead of renting, you buy. Fine, instead of couch-surfing, you rent. "
Tracy McMillan
Job
Age
Commitment
" I was, for some reason, born knowing how to get married. "
Tracy McMillan
Born
Some
Reason
" I've been standing at water coolers for the past thirty years talking to women about their love lives, and here's what I've learned: Eventually, most women I know want to be partnered. "
Tracy McMillan
Know
Past
Talking
" Here's the thing: you're not really ready for love until you have enough self-respect that if you met your exact self, but in a guy, you would totally, completely, absolutely want to be with him. "
Tracy McMillan
Love
Self
Enough
" The thing is, relationships never work out... until they do. You learn a lot from relationships that don't work out. "
Tracy McMillan
Never
Learn
You
" I'm a blunt person, not mean-spirited. I come from a place of love, but I'm interested in being real. "
Tracy McMillan
Real
Come
Person
" Without really trying to, I've become a sort of jailhouse lawyer of relationships - someone who's had to do so much work on her own case that I can now help you with yours. "
Tracy McMillan
You
Help
I Can
" Putting my words piece online was an important part of my plan to help women learn how to love themselves and have a better life. "
Tracy McMillan
Words
Better
Love
" Rather than diminishing the idea of 'truly needing' a relationship - and trying to deny it, shame it, or talk ourselves out of it - why not just celebrate it? It's exactly what the world needs. "
Tracy McMillan
Relationship
Trying
World
" I talk to women for a living. It's pretty much what I do with my day. "
Tracy McMillan
Women
Day
Pretty
" The deal is: most men just want to marry someone who is nice to them. "
Tracy McMillan
Nice
Someone
Want
" Ask anyone who has been in a love relationship for a while: nothing is perfect. "
Tracy McMillan
Perfect
Love
Relationship
" We have this false idea in our culture that if you haven't made it by 30, then you're never going to do anything interesting. My 40s have been the most incredible time of my life. "
Tracy McMillan
Never
My Life
Culture
" Relationships are like the world's most intense yoga! It's a daily practice. "
Tracy McMillan
Relationships
Practice
World
" Caring - about people, about things, about life - is an act of maturity. "
Tracy McMillan
People
Life
Caring
" Lots of people feel more alive when they're riding a roller-coaster relationship. But while this might be fun for a while, it can't possibly last. "
Tracy McMillan
Relationship
Feel
Alive
" All of us, consciously or unconsciously, set out to have the best possible love life. Valentine's Day simply shines a light on the degree to which that didn't - or hasn't yet - materialized. "
Tracy McMillan
Life
Love Life
Love
" There is no such thing as 'getting' a guy, house and kids. There is only surrendering to them. "
Tracy McMillan
House
Getting
Only