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" Fantasy is an exercise bicycle for the mind. It might not take you anywhere, but it tones up the muscles that can. Of course, I could be wrong. "

Terry Pratchett

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" I got quite annoyed after the Haiti earthquake. A baby was taken from the wreckage and people said it was a miracle. It would have been a miracle had God stopped the earthquake. More wonderful was that a load of evolved monkeys got together to save the life of a child that wasn't theirs. "

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" Taxation is just a sophisticated way of demanding money with menaces. "

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" Everything starts somewhere, although many physicists disagree. "

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" Opera happens because a large number of things amazingly fail to go wrong. "

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" If it wasn't for the fun and money, I really don't know why I'd bother. "

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" I am certain no one sets out to be cruel, but our treatment of the elderly ill seems to have no philosophy to it. As a society, we should establish whether we have a policy of life at any cost. "

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" Tolkien is eminently filmable, I think. 'The Lord of the Rings' is intensely... landscaped. But 'Discworld' is about dialogue, which is one reason why it might be hard to film. "

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" I didn't go to university. Didn't even finish A-levels. But I have sympathy for those who did. "

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" In the first book of my Discworld series, published more than 26 years ago, I introduced Death as a character; there was nothing particularly new about this - death has featured in art and literature since medieval times, and for centuries we have had a fascination with the Grim Reaper. "

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" My experience in Amsterdam is that cyclists ride where the hell they like and aim in a state of rage at all pedestrians while ringing their bell loudly, the concept of avoiding people being foreign to them. "

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" I have to write because if I don't get something down then after a while I feel it's going to bang the side of my head off. "

Terry Pratchett

" The intelligence of the creature known as a crowd, is the square root of the number of people in it. "

Terry Pratchett

" The 'New Testament', now, I quite liked. Jesus had a lot of good things to say, and as for his father, he must have been highly thought of by the community to work with wood - a material that couldn't have been widely available in Palestine. "

Terry Pratchett

" Five exclamation marks, the sure sign of an insane mind. "

Terry Pratchett

" There can be no better grounding for a lifetime as an author than to see humanity in all its various guises through the lens of the reporter for the town. "

Terry Pratchett

" Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life. "

Terry Pratchett

" Sometimes it is better to light a flamethrower than curse the darkness. "

Terry Pratchett

" Personally, I think the best motto for an educational establishment is: 'Or Would You Rather Be a Mule?' "

Terry Pratchett

" Go on, prove me wrong. Destroy the fabric of the universe. See if I care. "

Terry Pratchett

" There is a rumour going around that I have found God. I think this is unlikely because I have enough difficulty finding my keys, and there is empirical evidence that they exist. "

Terry Pratchett

" I intend, before the endgame looms, to die sitting in a chair in my own garden with a glass of brandy in my hand and Thomas Tallis on the iPod. Oh, and since this is England, I had better add, 'If wet, in the library.' Who could say that this is bad? "

Terry Pratchett

" You have to have really wide reading habits and pay attention to the news and just everything that's going on in the world: you need to. If you get this right, then the writing is a piece of cake. "

Terry Pratchett

" The thing is, 'Discworld' had been going on for a very long time, and I've written children's books as well. Usually when people have a really big series they franchise it, which I thought is a bit of a no-no, so I thought what I'd do is I'd franchise it to myself. "

Terry Pratchett

" There are things around, and I know where they can be got quite easily, but I quite like waking up to the sunshine. "

Terry Pratchett

" The pen is mightier than the sword if the sword is very short, and the pen is very sharp. "

Terry Pratchett

" Anger is wonderful. It keeps you going. I'm angry about bankers. About the government. "

Terry Pratchett

" Siren voices tell me, 'You don't have to keep going on.' And then you think, 'I'm a writer. What do I do? Sit there watching my wife clean up?' I don't know. I like being a writer. "

Terry Pratchett

" There are some people who hate my guts. But that goes with the territory. "

Terry Pratchett

" One thing that writers have in common is that they are readers first. They have read lots and lots of stuff, because they're just infested with lots of stuff. "

Terry Pratchett

" Only in our dreams are we free. The rest of the time we need wages. "

Terry Pratchett