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" Go on, prove me wrong. Destroy the fabric of the universe. See if I care. "

Terry Pratchett

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" If the government ever imposes a tax on books - and I wouldn't put it past them - I'm in dead trouble. "

Terry Pratchett

" In all seriousness, people think that it's the ideas that are important. Well, everyone has ideas, all the time. I tend to write mine down and remember them, but at some point you have to apply the bum to the seat and knock out about sixty five thousand words - that's how long a novel is. "

Terry Pratchett

" You can't remember the plot of the Dr Who movie because it didn't have one, just a lot of plot holes strung together. It did have a lot of flashing lights, though. "

Terry Pratchett

" In ancient times cats were worshipped as gods; they have not forgotten this. "

Terry Pratchett

" The 'New Testament', now, I quite liked. Jesus had a lot of good things to say, and as for his father, he must have been highly thought of by the community to work with wood - a material that couldn't have been widely available in Palestine. "

Terry Pratchett

" The ideal death, I think, is what was the ideal Victorian death, you know, with your grandchildren around you, a bit of sobbing. And you say goodbye to your loved ones, making certain that one of them has been left behind to look after the shop. "

Terry Pratchett

" The thing is, 'Discworld' had been going on for a very long time, and I've written children's books as well. Usually when people have a really big series they franchise it, which I thought is a bit of a no-no, so I thought what I'd do is I'd franchise it to myself. "

Terry Pratchett

" Mum had done everything you need to educate a kid. She made me a kid who likes books and she told me about 'Wind in the Willows' and read it and I thought this is weird, Rat, Mole, Toad and my first ever Bolshie thought - you know about 'The Wind in the Willows.' "

Terry Pratchett

" There was once a caustic comment from someone suggesting I was breeding a new race. Fans from different countries have married, amazing things like that. I've been to some of the weddings. I went to one here the other day, a pagan ceremony. "

Terry Pratchett

" In the beginning there was nothing, which exploded. "

Terry Pratchett

" Knowing that you are going to die is, I suspect, the beginning of wisdom. "

Terry Pratchett

" When I was a kid, I read the science-fiction shelves, and I read the fantasy shelves. "

Terry Pratchett

" I think we are waiting for an e-book that even non-techies can be comfortable with. From my point of view, the biggest change is that I don't have to spend most of the day printing out and packaging a manuscript. I think I almost miss that. "

Terry Pratchett

" I became a journalist at 17. A few hours later, I saw my first dead body, which was somewhat... colourful. That's when I learned you can go on throwing up after you run out of things to throw up. "

Terry Pratchett

" Writing is the most fun you can have by yourself. "

Terry Pratchett

" I like writing. I get cranky when I can't. Yes, I write books back to back, and I work very hard on them. "

Terry Pratchett

" Tolkien is eminently filmable, I think. 'The Lord of the Rings' is intensely... landscaped. But 'Discworld' is about dialogue, which is one reason why it might be hard to film. "

Terry Pratchett

" You can't trample infidels when you're a tortoise. I mean, all you could do is give them a meaningful look. "

Terry Pratchett

" One thing that writers have in common is that they are readers first. They have read lots and lots of stuff, because they're just infested with lots of stuff. "

Terry Pratchett

" I think it does Discworld good if I don't write about it all the time: sometimes you have to get it out of your system. "

Terry Pratchett

" Genius is always allowed some leeway, once the hammer has been pried from its hands and the blood has been cleaned up. "

Terry Pratchett

" Nothing I can say or devise, and nothing anybody else can say or devise, is going to be perfect. "

Terry Pratchett

" I don't think about the end game. I've got lots to occupy my mind. It's the rage that keeps me going. "

Terry Pratchett

" The pen is mightier than the sword if the sword is very short, and the pen is very sharp. "

Terry Pratchett

" It's useful to go out of this world and see it from the perspective of another one. "

Terry Pratchett

" I am certain no one sets out to be cruel, but our treatment of the elderly ill seems to have no philosophy to it. As a society, we should establish whether we have a policy of life at any cost. "

Terry Pratchett

" That's the most terrible thing about being an author - standing there at your mother's funeral, but you don't switch the author off. So your own innermost thoughts are grist for the mill. Who was it said - one of the famous lady novelists - 'unhappy is the family that contains an author'? "

Terry Pratchett

" There are some people who hate my guts. But that goes with the territory. "

Terry Pratchett

" I didn't go to university. Didn't even finish A-levels. But I have sympathy for those who did. "

Terry Pratchett

" I read the 'Old Testament' all the way through when I was about 13 and was horrified. A few months afterwards I read 'The Origin Of Species', hallucinating very mildly because I was in bed with flu at the time. Despite that, or because of that, it all made perfect sense. "

Terry Pratchett