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" Grooming oneself with all the crazed compulsion of an under-exercised lab rat in order to hook a rich man and obtain a lush lifestyle makes a certain (albeit seedy) sense. "

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" Families, generally, suck. And I say that as someone who, like my husband, had parents who proved the proverbial exception to the rule. "

Julie Burchill

Someone

Say

" The Feminist Me says that a woman's right to her own body should be inviolate at all times, free from fear of peeping paps. "

Julie Burchill

Fear

Body

" As a child, I wanted only two things - to be left alone to read my library books, and to get away from my provincial hometown and go to London to be a writer. And I always knew that when I got there, I wanted to make loads of money. "

" What men don't want, in fact what anyone who's any sort of thrill-seeking, intelligent adult doesn't want, is some crushing bore describing their emotions in real time every waking hour. "

" A therapist might suggest my generosity is a way of buying affection. But buying people's love has never been an issue for me. Generally speaking, I don't want their love. "

Julie Burchill

People

Love

" Being a monarchist - saying that one small group is born more worthy of respect than another - is just as warped and strange as being a racist. "

" I wouldn't know how to fool a man any more. My deceiving days seem so long ago. "

Julie Burchill

Days

Fool

" In Barcelona, things seem so different. For example, I know that it's traditionally the least Spanish city, but you'd never know they had a monarchy, coming here as a tourist - as opposed to the U.K., where the Queen is probably the best-known animal, vegetable and/or mineral going when it comes to overseas visitors. "

" Rachel Cusk's books are like pop-up volumes for grown-ups, the prose springing out of the page to bop you neatly between the eyes with its insights. "

" Graham Greene famously said that all writers need a chip of ice in their heart; Cusk can come across as the most beautiful ice palace of stalactites and stalagmites, and some people find her company, albeit by proxy, about as inviting as a long weekend in a walk-in frigidaire. "

" The truth of the matter is, beauty is a specific thing, rare and fleeting. Some of us have it in our teens, 20s and 30s and then lose it; most of us have it not at all. And that's perfectly okay. But lying to yourself that you have it when you don't seems to me simple-minded at best and psychotic at worst. "

Julie Burchill

Best

Truth

" It shouldn't come as any surprise that those who choose acting as a profession are phonies who live in a fantasy world. What is surprising is how many of them are blissfully unaware of it. "

" Whenever I am sent a new book on the lively arts, the first thing I do is look for myself in the index. "

" I am not one of those fat birds who feels miserable because models are thin. Frankly, I feel more insulted by the idea that unless I see other fat birds in fashion magazines, I will be reduced to a sniveling wreck of a human being. "

" One Christmas build-up tradition, however, has totally bypassed me - that of going up to town and 'doing a show.' "

" And call me a pig, but isn't it brilliantly refreshing how early the Dutch eat dinner? When they're still laying out the cutlery in achingly hip Barcelona, they're hanging the Closed sign on the restaurant doors of old Amsterdam. "

" Tears are sometimes an inappropriate response to death. When a life has been lived completely honestly, completely successfully, or just completely, the correct response to death's perfect punctuation mark is a smile. "

" When did women whose looks are not their living start conducting themselves like the simpering inmates of an Ottoman empire seraglio? "

" Fact is, famous people say fame stinks because they love it so - like a secret restaurant or holiday island they don't want the hoi polloi to get their grubby paws on. "

" I've always thought of beauty therapy, 'alternative' treatments and the like as the female equivalent of brothels - for essentially self-deceiving people who feel a bit hollow and have to pay to be touched. "

" I know that Brighton is famously a mixture of the seedy and the elegant, but in the summer of 2001 seediness swamped elegance hands down. "

" A good part - and definitely the most fun part - of being a feminist is about frightening men. "

" I'll declare my own interest right here at the start and admit that, like the vast majority of people, I find youthful looks appealing. "

" Lots of women love to accuse men of being immature when the fellow in question displays a reluctance to 'commit.' "

" Shame, like beauty, is often in the eye of the beholder. "

Julie Burchill

Shame

Beauty

" As I have got older, I have found myself making friends with the ease and swiftness that other people pick up fuzzballs on their jumpers. And I believe it is probably my lack of longing for 'The One' that makes me so popular. "

Julie Burchill

People

Myself

" It may be a cliche, but it's true - the build-up to Christmas is so much more pleasurable than the actual day itself. "

" Some say that Cusk has no sense of humour, but expecting giggles from this writer would be akin to expecting sonnets from Benny Hill. "

" Gluttony and idleness are two of life's great joys, but they are not honourable. "

" I believe, literally, in the God of the Old Testament, whom I understand as the Lord of the Jews and the Protestants. I'm a Christian Zionist, as well as a Christian feminist and a Christian socialist. "