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" I can't function if I don't have tea. I don't know whether it's psychological or a real necessity, but I just need it. "

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" Many's the audition I waltzed into unprepared and wondered why I didn't get it. I learned the hard way. "

" I don't like doing things by halves, and I realised you can't do stand-up comedy part-time. "

" Most people haven't seen my dramatic work, but I did 10 years of theater before I ever became a comic. I'm just better known for comedy. "

" One day I got an invite to help the Christina Noble Foundation, and by this stage, I'd already been talking about her for 10 years. I said 'yes' right away, and that was the first time I met her. "

" Yves Saint Laurent will never go out of business so long as I'm buying mountains of Touche Eclat. "

" I'm doing my best to be mindful about how I'm living: to be kind and patient, and not to impose a bad mood on somebody else. Being mindful is as good a way to be spiritual as anything else. "

" I think boarding school does give you an independence. "

" It wasn't that I left acting; it's just that I put it aside while I set about becoming a comic. "

" I have no proper money to invest! "

" I love peppermint tea, as it's much nicer than taking anything chemical for settling your stomach. "

" When I came on the scene, there was The Nualas, who were doing character comedy, but there weren't any other women doing stand-up because Michelle Read had gone more into theatre. "

" I am pretty much as you see me. I don't have deep, dark depths and go home in despair. "

" Acting is very much an all-or-nothing job. "

" I love motherhood. I certainly wasn't aware of any mothering instincts until I had babies. I wasn't a person who desperately wanted to have kids, but you don't get it until you do it, and, suddenly, this nurturing instinct exists. "

" The notion that patience is a virtue is something you don't fully appreciate until you're a parent. You need endless patience with little ones. "

" I admire Pat Shortt as a businessman. Such acumen is unusual for an entertainer. He did all his own deals. I learnt a lot from Pat when I was on the road with him for a year. "

" I was never very good at being an unemployed actor. I always thought that I should have been doing something pro-active. I was never good at doing juvenile leads. I suppose it's because I have this big sarcastic head on me. "

" Yes... I miss that everyone in Ireland tries to knock some humour out of every situation. I don't think I appreciated that. It's unique to Ireland. "

" I'm a great lighter and lover of candles, particularly fragranced ones, as I'm kind of addicted to scent. "

" I knew I couldn't do what Eddie Izzard does, so I just tried to write some stories that were based, or partly based, on my own experiences. "

" I knew I wanted to be an actress from the age of 13. "

" Waiting to be hired, as an actor, especially, is soul-destroying... There is always something you can do... Create something, a play reading... Anything. But don't rely on other people to come to you. Put yourself out there. "

" Filling a theatre like the Olympia or Vicar Street on your own name is a very rewarding moment. "

" Growing up, I was your classic Catholic Irish kid. I went to mass every Sunday. Then in secondary school I went to boarding school, and there was mass seven days a week before breakfast - it may have put me off! "

" Work hard, play hard, dream big, love loads, laugh as much as you can, and give back. "

" You worry about whether you are match-fit, coming back to the stand-up stage. "

" I have never, ever slept through my child crying unless I have had a sleeping tablet; and I only take a sleeping tablet when I know Steve, my husband, is on duty. We take turns: he does one night, I do the next. "

" I can make my living out of Ireland, but the reason I came to London was that I felt I'd gone as far as I could go in Ireland. "

" I would have benefited a lot from proper training. I could have done with a strong wake-up call about getting jobs. "

" I spent seven years in clubs in England, Australia, etc. Not all comedians cross over to sell out in a theatre. "