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" I grow as many of our vegetables as I can, because my granddad was a professional gardener, and it's in the blood. "

Terry Pratchett

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" Christ managed to boil down an awful lot of commandments to a few very simple rules for living. It's when you go backwards through the 'begats' and the Garden of Eden, and you start thinking, 'Hang on, that's a big punishment for eating one lousy apple... There's a human-rights issue.' "

Terry Pratchett

" I've got wide tastes, but I don't like jazz. "

Terry Pratchett

" The only superstition I have is that I must start a new book on the same day that I finish the last one, even if it's just a few notes in a file. I dread not having work in progress. "

Terry Pratchett

" I know three people who have got better after a brain tumour. I haven't heard of anyone who's got better from Alzheimer's. "

Terry Pratchett

" Personally, I think the best motto for an educational establishment is: 'Or Would You Rather Be a Mule?' "

Terry Pratchett

" You can't die with an unfinished book. "

Terry Pratchett

" Taxation is just a sophisticated way of demanding money with menaces. "

Terry Pratchett

" Previous generations understood about death, and undoubtedly would have seen a reasonable amount of death. Once you get into the Victorian era, you might well have seen the funerals of many of your siblings before you were very old. "

Terry Pratchett

" As far as I'm concerned, I'm a writer who's writing books, and therefore, I don't want to die. You'd miss the end of the book wouldn't you? You can't die with an unfinished book. "

Terry Pratchett

" In my heart, I'm just a kid from the council houses. I can remember the old cottage and my dad coming round with the tin bath. I'm not a rich man. "

Terry Pratchett

" Only in our dreams are we free. The rest of the time we need wages. "

Terry Pratchett

" I've always felt that what I have going for me is not my imagination, because everyone has an imagination. What I have is a relentlessly controlled imagination. What looks like wild invention is actually quite carefully calculated. "

Terry Pratchett

" You can't trample infidels when you're a tortoise. I mean, all you could do is give them a meaningful look. "

Terry Pratchett

" I like writing. I get cranky when I can't. Yes, I write books back to back, and I work very hard on them. "

Terry Pratchett

" You have to have really wide reading habits and pay attention to the news and just everything that's going on in the world: you need to. If you get this right, then the writing is a piece of cake. "

Terry Pratchett

" It occurred to me that at one point it was like I had two diseases - one was Alzheimer's, and the other was knowing I had Alzheimer's. "

Terry Pratchett

" I got into science fiction by being interested in astronomy first. "

Terry Pratchett

Science Fiction

" Anger is wonderful. It keeps you going. I'm angry about bankers. About the government. "

Terry Pratchett

" Five exclamation marks, the sure sign of an insane mind. "

Terry Pratchett

" I can no longer type, so I use TalkingPoint and Dragon Dictate. It's a speech-to-text program, and there's an add-on for talking which some guys came up with. "

Terry Pratchett

" I must have read every issue of 'Punch' published in the 20th century, and I think in the process I picked up the true voice of English humour - that amiable, fairly liberal, laconic voice which you find in something like 'Three Men in a Boat.' "

Terry Pratchett

" I read the 'Old Testament' all the way through when I was about 13 and was horrified. A few months afterwards I read 'The Origin Of Species', hallucinating very mildly because I was in bed with flu at the time. Despite that, or because of that, it all made perfect sense. "

Terry Pratchett

" I think we are waiting for an e-book that even non-techies can be comfortable with. From my point of view, the biggest change is that I don't have to spend most of the day printing out and packaging a manuscript. I think I almost miss that. "

Terry Pratchett

" You can't remember the plot of the Dr Who movie because it didn't have one, just a lot of plot holes strung together. It did have a lot of flashing lights, though. "

Terry Pratchett

" My experience in Amsterdam is that cyclists ride where the hell they like and aim in a state of rage at all pedestrians while ringing their bell loudly, the concept of avoiding people being foreign to them. "

Terry Pratchett

" The pen is mightier than the sword if the sword is very short, and the pen is very sharp. "

Terry Pratchett

" The 'New Testament', now, I quite liked. Jesus had a lot of good things to say, and as for his father, he must have been highly thought of by the community to work with wood - a material that couldn't have been widely available in Palestine. "

Terry Pratchett

" I don't really plan. I'm almost intuitive about things. "

Terry Pratchett

" Go on, prove me wrong. Destroy the fabric of the universe. See if I care. "

Terry Pratchett

" I've lost both parents in the last two years, so you pick up on that stuff. That's the most terrible thing about being an author - standing there at your mother's funeral, but you don't switch the author off. So your own innermost thoughts are grist for the mill. "

Terry Pratchett