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" I live in Indiana and teach at Purdue University, a wonderful school with some of the brightest students I have ever had the privilege of working with. My colleagues are powerful and intelligent and kind. The cost of living is low, the prairie is wide, and on clear nights, I can see all the stars in the sky above. "

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" I was in love with the idea of love, so I created elaborate fictions for my relationships - fictions that allowed me to believe that what any given paramour and I shared looked a lot like love. "

Roxane Gay

Love

Relationships

" In truth, I don't care about making feminism more accessible to anyone. "

" I can consider not only great art, but the context in which that art has been created. I can consider the people who paid a price for that art to be created and whether or not I want to appreciate that art on their backs. "

" My parents have been married for 42 years. Their marriage has been - from what I can see - a happy one. "

" That's what is always fascinating about racism - how it is allowed, if not encouraged, to flourish freely in public spaces, the way racism and bigotry are so often unquestioned. "

" Definitely, there is a sense in my writing that people now know me in a personal way. And to an extent, that's true because I write about very personal things, and I use the personal often to contextualize some of these sociopolitical issues that we're dealing with. And to an extent, they're right. They know something about me. "

" After the Boston Marathon bombings, people shared grief and outrage on social media. "

" This is the real problem feminism faces. Too many people are willfully ignorant about what the word means and what the movement aims to achieve. "

" 2014 was a year of intense social upheaval. In truth, the same could be said for most every year. There is no standstill in a world filled with so many people, scrambling for so much. "

" I am totally down with disagreement. I don't like Haterade, but disagreement is wonderful. When someone disagrees, we try to reach common ground. That's good. "

" When I was a child, my parents took my brothers and me to Port-au-Prince during the summer so we could get to know the country of our ancestors. Because Haiti is an island, the beach is everywhere. Haitians are particular, even snobby, about beaches. "

Roxane Gay

Parents

Summer

" I love, but I am not entirely sure how to be loved: how to be seen and known for the utterly flawed woman I am. It demands surrender. It demands acknowledging that I am not perfect, but perhaps I deserve affection anyway. "

" I recognize that I'm human, and the older I get, the more I realize how fallible I am, how fallible we all are. "

Roxane Gay

Older

How

" I have a job I'm pretty good at. I am in charge of things. I am on committees. People respect me and take my counsel. I want to be strong and professional, but I resent how hard I have to work to be taken seriously, to receive a fraction of the consideration I might otherwise receive. "

Roxane Gay

Job

Work

" Most of the serious disagreement I get comes through email or social media, where people are more comfortable. "

" I believe in the freedom of expression, unequivocally - though, as I have written before, I wish more people would understand that freedom of expression is not freedom from consequence. "

" I don't want the whole of my writing or my intellectual energy given over to race because I have diverse interests. "

" What worries me is that 'post-racial' America is not that different from the Americas that have preceded us, and it might not ever be. "

Roxane Gay

Ever

Might

" I am failing as a woman. I am failing as a feminist. To freely accept the feminist label would not be fair to good feminists. If I am, indeed, a feminist, I am a rather bad one. I am a mess of contradictions. "

" Public intellectuals are often put in the position of having their words, no matter how off-the-cuff, treated as doctrine. "

" There has been, and there will continue to be, vigorous discussions about race in America. I worry that little will come of these discussions because we aren't addressing what must be done to change the current racial climate. "

" Social media is something of a double-edged sword. At its best, social media offers unprecedented opportunities for marginalized people to speak and bring much needed attention to the issues they face. At its worst, social media also offers 'everyone' an unprecedented opportunity to share in collective outrage without reflection. "

" I think it was really entering my 30s that I began to embrace feminism and call myself a feminist. "

" We cannot sway extremists with rational thought or with our ideas of right and wrong. "

" Florida is a strange place: hot, beautiful, ugly. I love it here, and how nothing makes sense but still, somehow, there is a rhythm. "

" We have to believe that we can hold different points of view without labeling each other bad feminists. "

" I am 39. I am single. I am a black woman. I have too many advanced degrees. Many a news story tells me finding true love is likely a hopeless proposition. Now is the time when I need to believe in fairy tales. "

" A lot of ink is given over to mythologizing female friendships as curious, fragile relationships that are always intensely fraught. Stop reading writing that encourages this mythology. "

" You cannot reason with people who don't recognize the humanity in all of us. "

" In Hollywood, a normal-size body is unruly. "