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" I love being famous. It validates that I have something to say. "

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" I'm psyched-up when I do radio. I can reach hundreds of thousands of people in a market. And way psyched-up when I'm on television. For people not to take it seriously is foolish. "

" My act is always a work in progress. I pray I have a bad day before a show. "

" I never wanted to do observational humor because I never wanted to tell people what they were seeing. "

" My humor is channeling everything through my brain. For example, when I talk about something, it's how Richard Lewis feels about it. I'm a storyteller. I do a lot of free association. "

" When I was younger, I listened to the greats: Winters, Mel and Carl, Nichols and May, Pryor, Carlin, Klein, Berman and lots of Lenny Bruce albums. But once I started doing fairly well, I didn't want to hear anybody's jokes or premises. "

" My grandmother was a Jewish juggler: she used to worry about six things at once. "

" I quit therapy because my analyst was trying to help me behind my back. "

" I read somewhere that when I go on stage, people realize that they're not me and they feel better. When I walk off the stage, people know who I really am. I'm not saying it's great comedy, cool comedy or better comedy - but that's what I do, and I do it first for myself. "

" Most Texans think Hanukkah is some sort of duck call. "

" There's a thin line between narcissism, even if it's a healthy narcissism, and entertainment. "

" When I started out, I struggled, and I was broke a lot. But I'm glad I struggled, and I'm glad I was broke a lot. "

" I didn't ever feel close to my real family. I didn't feel validated; I never felt right because I was always wrong. "

" When you're in love it's the most glorious two and a half days of your life. "