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" If a woman wants to take her husband's name, that's her choice, and I still think she can be feminist while doing that. "
Roxane Gay
Husband
Think
Woman
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" Margaret Sanger didn't just introduce the idea of birth control into our culture at large, she freed women from indenture to their bodies. "
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Control
Culture
She
" No one is helped when cultural critics use their voices irresponsibly. "
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Critics
Voices
Use
" In truth, I don't care about making feminism more accessible to anyone. "
Roxane Gay
Truth
Accessible
Feminism
" I would love for everyone to be a feminist, but I have to respect people's choices. If you don't want to be a feminist and don't want to claim feminism, that's entirely your right. "
Roxane Gay
Respect
Love
You
" I am totally down with disagreement. I don't like Haterade, but disagreement is wonderful. When someone disagrees, we try to reach common ground. That's good. "
Roxane Gay
Reach
Down
Someone
" I think there are a lot of rules for women. We have a lot of expectations and a lot of rules for women. So we're expected to march in a straight line, and when we don't, all hell breaks loose. "
Roxane Gay
Women
Hell
Expectations
" I can consider not only great art, but the context in which that art has been created. I can consider the people who paid a price for that art to be created and whether or not I want to appreciate that art on their backs. "
Roxane Gay
I Can
Appreciate
Art
" In Hollywood, a normal-size body is unruly. "
Roxane Gay
Hollywood
Body
Unruly
" As I started to think about how I can claim feminism while also acknowledging my humanity and my imperfections, 'bad feminism' simply seemed like the best answer. "
Roxane Gay
Bad
Best
Humanity
" What worries me is that 'post-racial' America is not that different from the Americas that have preceded us, and it might not ever be. "
Roxane Gay
Ever
Me
Might
" I reject the idea that when young women make choices with which we disagree, they are acting without autonomy. "
Roxane Gay
Acting
Young
Women
" People don't want to think... I mean, they don't! They just want to say, 'Oh, okay, feminists are humorless man-haters,' and that's simply not the case. There are radical people and radical ideas in absolutely every movement, but that doesn't mean they define the ideals. "
Roxane Gay
People
Ideas
Okay
" My parents have been married for 42 years. Their marriage has been - from what I can see - a happy one. "
Roxane Gay
Marriage
See
Happy
" Social media is something of a double-edged sword. At its best, social media offers unprecedented opportunities for marginalized people to speak and bring much needed attention to the issues they face. At its worst, social media also offers 'everyone' an unprecedented opportunity to share in collective outrage without reflection. "
Roxane Gay
Best
People
Reflection
" I keep trying to imagine a universe in which too many public figures declaring themselves feminists would be a bad thing. "
Roxane Gay
Trying
Keep
Bad
" Florida is a strange place: hot, beautiful, ugly. I love it here, and how nothing makes sense but still, somehow, there is a rhythm. "
Roxane Gay
Sense
Ugly
Beautiful
" I live in Indiana and teach at Purdue University, a wonderful school with some of the brightest students I have ever had the privilege of working with. My colleagues are powerful and intelligent and kind. The cost of living is low, the prairie is wide, and on clear nights, I can see all the stars in the sky above. "
Roxane Gay
Stars
School
Powerful
" A lot of ink is given over to mythologizing female friendships as curious, fragile relationships that are always intensely fraught. Stop reading writing that encourages this mythology. "
Roxane Gay
Relationships
Reading
Curious
" I try to understand faith and religion. I was raised by wonderful Catholic parents who were deeply faithful and taught us that God is a God of love. "
Roxane Gay
Try
Religion
Parents
" It's an amusing idea to some, this feminism thing - this audacious notion that women should be able to move through the world as freely, and enjoy the same inalienable rights and bodily autonomy, as men. At least, that's the impression given when feminism and feminists are all too often the targets of lazy humor. "
Roxane Gay
Lazy
Enjoy
Women
" Throughout any given season of 'The Bachelor,' the women exclaim that the experience is like a fairy tale. They suffer the machinations of reality television, pursuing - along with several other women, often inebriated - the promise of happily ever after. "
Roxane Gay
Television
Reality
Women
" There has been, and there will continue to be, vigorous discussions about race in America. I worry that little will come of these discussions because we aren't addressing what must be done to change the current racial climate. "
Roxane Gay
America
Done
Race
" It sometimes feels like the workplace is immune from social upheaval. We go to work and do the best we can, and at the end of the day, we return to our lives. We don't abandon who we are, however, when we begin and end our workday. Who we are shapes how we are perceived in the workplace and, in turn, how we perform in the workplace. "
Roxane Gay
Best
End
End Of The Day
" I'm sick of hearing, thinking and talking about Woody Allen. Nonetheless, the allegations against him continue to capture our national attention because so much of the story is strange and sordid. "
Roxane Gay
Sick
Attention
Thinking
" Placing Margaret Sanger on the $20 bill will remind us of what she has done for women and our reproductive health and how the fight for reproductive freedom is an ongoing one. "
Roxane Gay
Women
She
Health
" We have cellphones and smartphones and iDevices and laptops and the ability to be perpetually connected. We never have to miss anything, significant or insignificant. "
Roxane Gay
Never
Ability
Anything
" I believe in the freedom of expression, unequivocally - though, as I have written before, I wish more people would understand that freedom of expression is not freedom from consequence. "
Roxane Gay
Wish
Believe
Freedom
" I think one of the most important things we can do as feminists is acknowledge that, even though we have womanhood in common, we have to start to think about the ways in which we're different, how those differences affect us, and what kinds of needs we have based on our differences. "
Roxane Gay
Differences
Us
Think
" Maybe true love isn't out there for me, but I can sublimate my loneliness with the notion that true love is out there for someone. "
Roxane Gay
Loneliness
Love
Love Is
" Most of the serious disagreement I get comes through email or social media, where people are more comfortable. "
Roxane Gay
People
Social Media
Serious