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" If you don't know what you want, you end up with a lot you don't. "

Chuck Palahniuk

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" I've always thought stand-up comedians were the oral storytellers of our time, because they know rhetoric, they know delivery, they know timing, they know all of these things that you can only learn by telling a story out loud and interacting with an audience. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" I like to get people moving and jumping. I think it's good to add more emotion and chaos. "

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" In my family, we can't just sit and be together. We have to be shelling peas or husking corn or something. A larger task. Some way of being with people. "

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" I am the cause of all my upsets. I am my worst enemy. "

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" If you don't believe what other people believe, then they'll accuse you of being nihilistic. "

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" If you start in the pit of despair with these profane, awful things, even a glimmer of hope or awareness is going to occur that's much brighter coming from this dark, awful beginning. "

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" Sometimes, like in 'Invisible Monsters,' I get too out of control, and instead of a plot point every chapter, I want a plot point in every sentence. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" To be honest, I hate silence. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" People have to deal with their issues together; they have to expose themselves and kind of exhaust themselves. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" Think about George Orwell's three-minute hate from the novel '1984' and how that left everyone sort of exhausted and able to live their boring humdrum lives. If our lives are going to continue being unfulfilled and boring, perhaps we do need some sort of short-term violent chaos incorporated into them, to make them more palatable. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" While writing, I tend to repeat the same song, endlessly, for thousands of times. This helps me ignore any lyrics, and helps create a consistent mood for each book. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" Once religion has been dismissed by primarily an intellectual class of people, we lose the really useful social functions of religion... What replaces it might be worse than what we throw away. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" People say I make up wild stories. But all I have to do is write down stuff that really happens. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" When did the future switch from being a promise to a threat? "

Chuck Palahniuk

" Emotionally, in our minds, we get so filled with resentments where we've got a story about absolutely everything. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" I have a lot of money. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" Men want to make the best use of time and want to see how something can inform them and give them a stronger sense of power. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" I've got two dogs; they're Boston terriers, and they're allowed everywhere. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" Find out what you're afraid of and go live there. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" I don't do much more than organise other people's ideas and insights and thoughts, and sort of harvest them, and inventory them and present them. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" The best thing about getting a flu shot is that you never again need to wash your hands. That's how I see it. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" When I first read the story 'Guts' in workshop - my fellow writers that I've been meeting with for almost 20 years - they laughed; they didn't have any kind of shock reaction. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" Mr. Olsen in the fifth grade made me want to be a writer. He said, 'Chuck, you do this really well. And this is much better than setting fires, so keep it up.' That made me a writer. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" I don't care what they do with my book so long as the flippin check clears. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" Every author has to eventually write a food book. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" To merely observe your culture without contributing to it seems very close to existing as a ghost. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" I think my heart always goes out to men at the peak of their celebrity who checked out. There's such an odd, horrible trend in my lifetime for it - Kurt Cobain, David Foster Wallace, Alexander McQueen, Heath Ledger. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" A short story is something that you can hold in your mind. You can really analyze how the entire thing works, like a machine. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" It takes a lot to get people talking in airplanes. But once they start talking, you just can't shut them up. "

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" A minute of perfection was worth the effort. A moment was the most you could ever expect from perfection. "

Chuck Palahniuk