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" I'm like tax. You're going to pay one way or the other. "

Shaquille O'Neal

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" Look up the word role in the dictionary and you'll see it means playing a part. That's why I call myself a real model. "

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" I've always been a leader. Every team I've played on, I've led my way. "

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" Being here feels like I'm out of prison. This is the right place, the right time, the right team. "

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" I am the number one Ninja and I have killed all the Shoguns in front of me. "

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" I'm on a mission. And I know the older I get, I may lose a step or two, but it's all up in the medulla oblongata. I've got a lot up there. I've got a lot of knowledge... in this medulla oblongata. "

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" I just want to keep people entertained. "

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" Every time I do something silly, it comes off really funny because it's natural. "

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" When I'm done playing basketball, I want do something bigger. I'm working on my doctorate right now at Barry University in Florida. "

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" But that is the only thing that slows me down is the system. No one, two or three was big enough to slow me down, only the system. It was the system that slowed me down to make my numbers fall. Not because I am older. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" My father made me who I am. He gave me a basketball and told me to play with the ball, sleep with the ball, dream with the ball. Just don't take it to school. I used it as a pillow, and it never gave me a stiff neck. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I love race car drivers, I love gymnastics, I love UFC, I love police officers, I love firefighters. I just try to give them the same enjoyment they give me. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" But, hey I did everything the right way and earned my spot in this game, nothing was given to me. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" This is a tough game. There are times when you've got to play hurt, when you've got to block out the pain. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" David Stern should get with the mothers of the NBA and let the moms decide what the dress code should be. I asked my mother if I could wear a chain, and she told me yeah. So I do stuff that my parents allow me to do. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I want to be known as 'The Big Shakespeare.' It was Shakespeare that said, 'Some men are born great, some achieve greatness, some have greatness thrust upon them.' "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I want to be strong, dominant. Like Wilt Chamberlain. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" We want to win. We want to win big. We want to win the whole thing. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" There is no answer to the Pythagorean theorem. Well, there is an answer, but by the time you figure it out, I got 40 points, 10 rebounds and then we're planning for the parade. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I guess people think the taller you are the more dominant you have to be. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" When I get old, I'm going to the old folks' home. I don't want to be one of those guys who's hanging around the house bothering the kids. But not just any old folks' home. I want the whole top floor. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I started out as a young Ninja and killed all of the Shoguns. I am a Shogun now and I'm holding my spot. There probably won't be another Shogun after this. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" As a youngster, my mother and father always drilled into my head having something to fall back on. My father was kind of funny. I'd score 40 points. I'd come home and say, 'Look dad, I scored 40.' He'd never have a smile on his face. He'd be like, 'I saw that move you did. What if you'd hurt your knee?' "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I'm very excited about my new agreement with the Heat. This contract allows me to address all of my family's long-term financial goals while allowing the Heat the ability to acquire those players that we need to win a championship. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" My job has always been to entertain people. I want people to laugh. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I'm short and to the point. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" Everything happens for a reason. I'm used to it, I prepare for it. Like I say, at the end of the day, those in charge of their own destiny are going to do what's right for them and their family. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I play against a front and a back every night, Ming does not have to do that, Duncan does not have to do that, Garnett doesn't do that. I am the only one that has to do that. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I had an awful first quarter but I picked it up. To all you single guys out there, it's not how you start the date, it's how you finish it sir. A lot of people can, you know, start the date with flowers and candy, but if you don't finish the date - you know what I mean? "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I do what I do. Always. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" If I were a painter, you'd be calling me Shaqcasso. "

Shaquille O'Neal