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" My job has always been to entertain people. I want people to laugh. "

Shaquille O'Neal

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" I just want to keep people entertained. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" Me shooting 40% at the foul line is just God's way to say nobody's perfect. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I've always been a leader. Every team I've played on, I've led my way. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" Nobody's going to tell me how to be different, so stop asking me. Stop asking me what two-plus-two is. Everybody knows two-plus-two is five. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" When you flop, that's just another message that you don't know how to play me. Stand up and take your medicine like a man. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I'm an unorthodox type of guy, a funny guy - at least I think I'm funny. And one of the things I like to do is come up with nicknames for myself. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I don't believe that I personally have been changed by the money. The bad thing is people assume you've changed because now you have money. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" Someday I might have to put down a basketball and have a regular 9-to-5 like everybody else. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" Donald Trump is a great friend, and he has four or five Picassos on his plane. And that's where I would look at them. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" When I get old, I'm going to the old folks' home. I don't want to be one of those guys who's hanging around the house bothering the kids. But not just any old folks' home. I want the whole top floor. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I'm very educated and can give you somewhat of a vocabulary, but I don't get to the philosophical side. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" David Stern should get with the mothers of the NBA and let the moms decide what the dress code should be. I asked my mother if I could wear a chain, and she told me yeah. So I do stuff that my parents allow me to do. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I'm like tax. You're going to pay one way or the other. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" If you got the game, you got the game. That's why Tiger Woods is out there playing golf with Greg Norman. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I was a medium-level juvenile delinquent from Newark who always dreamed about doing a movie. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I'm very excited about my new agreement with the Heat. This contract allows me to address all of my family's long-term financial goals while allowing the Heat the ability to acquire those players that we need to win a championship. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" For all my friends in the media who like quotes, mark this quote down. From this day on I'd like to be known as 'The Big Aristotle' because Aristotle once said, 'Excellence is not a singular act; it's a habit. You are what you repeatedly do.' "

Shaquille O'Neal

" Kids can still call me Shaq, but adults should call me Dr. O'Neal. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I started out as a football player. I liked to inflict pain. In basketball, it was the same thing. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I've been playing on Christmas for the last 10, 11, 12 years. So just got to get up early with the babies, and give them their toys and try to get a nap in and just come to play. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I average 25 with three guys on me and they are just looking at stats I guess. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I never worry about the problem. I worry about the solution. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" The best quality about Kobe Bryant? You want me to be honest? I don't know. I'll tell you why. I open my arms to everybody. But he never stepped forward for the embrace. So I never really got to know him. I don't know anything about him, and it's kinda sad. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I guess people think the taller you are the more dominant you have to be. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" Generals don't panic; then the troops never panic. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" Look up the word role in the dictionary and you'll see it means playing a part. That's why I call myself a real model. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" Every time I do something silly, it comes off really funny because it's natural. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I'm done with the nicknames. Actually, when I obtain my doctorate, I will not allow people to call me Shaq anymore, either. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" Because I'm so big, you have to look at me. I think of myself as a monument. But sometimes I like to feel small. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" When you're in championships, it's never about what you do. It's always about what other people do. "

Shaquille O'Neal