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" In actual fact, I have always been a conservative cross, borne sadly by liberal friends. "

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" I never miss a chance to have sex or appear on television. "

" It's always best to stay out of other people's divorces. And their civil wars. "

" There is only one party in the United States: the Property party... and it has two right wings: Republican and Democrat. "

" Every generation gets the Tiny Tim it deserves. "

" As societies grow decadent, the language grows decadent, too. Words are used to disguise, not to illuminate, action: you liberate a city by destroying it. Words are to confuse, so that at election time people will solemnly vote against their own interests. "

" Litigation takes the place of sex at middle age. "

" Corporations must pay tax. "

" It is very difficult for a writer of my generation, if he is honest, to pretend indifference to the work of Somerset Maugham. He was always so entirely there. "

" When I say 'president,' I still mean Roosevelt - wisely, I think. "

" Democracy is supposed to give you the feeling of choice, like Painkiller X and Painkiller Y. But they're both just aspirin. "

" The United States was founded by the brightest people in the country - and we haven't seen them since. "

" To a man, ornithologists are tall, slender, and bearded so that they can stand motionless for hours, imitating kindly trees, as they watch for birds. "

" It is a paradox of the acquisitive society in which we now live that although private morals are regulated by law, the entrepreneur is allowed considerable freedom to use - and abuse - the public in order to make money. "

" Americans are future-minded to the point of obsession. We are impatient at living in the present. Tomorrow is bound to be better... next year, next century, always what might be rather than what is. This trait in us makes for 'progress;' it also makes for a continuing dissatisfaction. "

" The individual's desire to dominate his environment is not a desirable trait in a society which every day grows more and more confining. "

" That loyal retainer of the Chase Manhattan Bank, the American president. "

" A racial or religious or tribal identity is a kind of fact. "

" Friends, there is no Left in American politics. "

" What other culture could have produced someone like Hemingway and not seen the joke? "

" Does one ever read a politician's books? "

" Jack Kennedy very much enjoyed Fletcher Knebel's thriller 'Seven Days in May,' later a film. The story: a jingo based on the real-life Admiral Arthur Radford plans a military coup to take over the White House. "

" All children alarm their parents, if only because you are forever expecting to encounter yourself. "

" It's odd to meet a rather elderly man who says, 'I've been reading you all my life.' It makes you feel a slight chill. "

" Each youth betrays considerable anxiety about the wedding night ahead. "

" Gossip is conversation about people. "

" In essence, Clinton's Anti-Terrorism Act would set up a national police force, over the long-dead bodies of the founders. "

" Like the TV networks, once our government has a hit, it will be repeated over and over again. "

" No sooner does an American president take his oath of office than the speculation begins: Will he be reelected in four years' time? If not, who will succeed him? A member of his own party? The other party? "

" Jews, blacks and homosexuals are despised by the Christian and Communist majorities of East and West. Also, as a result of the invention of Israel, Jews can now count on the hatred of the Islamic world. "

" Remember, I'm West Point, where I was born. My father went there. "