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" Learning in our family was entirely self-directed. "
Tara Westover
Family
Our
Entirely
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" When I came to Cambridge, I was involved in the ward for a little bit, but I did have a very gradual process of trying to work out what I thought a good life consisted of. "
Tara Westover
Good
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Thought
" It's very difficult to continue to believe in yourself and that you're a good person when the people who know you best don't. "
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Believe In Yourself
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" I didn't even have a birth certificate until I was 9 years old, which meant that, according to the state of Idaho and the federal government, I just didn't exist. "
Tara Westover
Years
Just
Government
" We think love is noble, and in some ways, it is. But in some ways, it isn't. Love is just love. And sometimes people do terrible things because of it. "
Tara Westover
Love Is
Think
Sometimes
" I knew how to write like an academic, so I knew how to write academic papers and essays and things. But the things that are great for an essay are unbearable in narrative writing. "
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Write
Writing
Like
" My parents would say to me, 'You can teach yourself anything better than someone else can teach it to you.' That was the whole ethos of my family. "
Tara Westover
Yourself
Better
Family
" My mother was a midwife and a herbalist, so we would go on these long walks, looking for yarrow or rosehips or whatever she needed to make her tinctures. "
Tara Westover
Mother
Go
Her
" I think you can change your belief, but sometimes your behavior takes a lot longer. "
Tara Westover
Change
Belief
You
" I was 17 the first time I set foot in a classroom, but 10 years later, I would graduate from Cambridge with a Ph.D. 'Educated' is the story of how I came by my education. It is also the story of how I lost my family. "
Tara Westover
Time
Lost
Education
" We'd had books in my house growing up, but we had never had anything like lectures. I had never written an essay for my mother. I had never taken an exam. Because I was working a lot as a kid, I just hadn't elected to read that much. "
Tara Westover
House
Mother
Kid
" Publishing a book is a very different thing than writing one. "
Tara Westover
Book
Writing
Publishing
" I choose not to see my parents because I value myself - and they didn't value me or my mind. "
Tara Westover
Mind
Parents
Value
" I used to roof hay barns for my father. It's dangerous work. Writing is much better. "
Tara Westover
Better
Writing
Work
" I felt like I needed to come to terms with the decision I'd made to let go of my family. What do you do when you want to be loyal to your family but you feel that loyalty to them is in conflict somehow with loyalty to yourself? "
Tara Westover
Yourself
Loyalty
Conflict
" Anger can be a good thing. It's a mechanism that your brain uses to get you out of situations that are bad for you. But in terms of leading a peaceful life, it is not very productive. "
Tara Westover
Anger
Brain
Good
" I think for people who are inside these relationships that are really hard to leave, there is always a compelling reason to stay. It's not that they are wholly bad people. "
Tara Westover
Relationships
Think
People
" I think if you're going to abuse someone, you really have to convince them of two things. First, you have to normalise what you're doing, convince them that it's not that bad. And the second thing is to convince them that they deserve it in some way. "
Tara Westover
Doing
Someone
Way
" I think, initially, my rebellion, my rebellion of going to college when my dad would have liked me to stay home and work in the herbs, I think that it was a pretty mild rebellion in the sense that I thought, 'Well, I'm going to go learn how to be a music teacher so that I can come home and do choir.' "
Tara Westover
Home
Work
College
" I had a mental breakdown while doing my Ph.D. at Cambridge, soon after I cut off contact with my parents, and I started seeing the university counsellor, one of the best decisions I ever made. There's something very nourishing in setting aside an hour a week to talk. "
Tara Westover
Parents
Doing
Decisions
" I think a lot of people have grown up with the idea that they can't learn things themselves. They think they need an institution to provide them with knowledge and teach them how to do things. I couldn't disagree more. "
Tara Westover
Learn
Think
People
" We think about education as a stepping stone into a higher socio-economic class, into a better job. And it does do those things. But I don't think that's what it really is. I experienced it as getting access to different ideas and perspectives and using them to construct my own mind. "
Tara Westover
Education
Ideas
Job
" When you write, you are alone. It can be a bit of a shock later to discover that people have read what you've written! "
Tara Westover
Bit
You
Write
" During my first semester of college, I raised my hand in a class and asked the professor to define a word I didn't know. The word was holocaust, and I had to ask because, until that moment, I had never heard of it. "
Tara Westover
Moment
Know
Class
" I had been educated in the rhythms of the mountain, rhythms in which change was never fundamental, only cyclical. The same sun appeared each morning, swept over the valley, and dropped behind the peak. The snows that fell in winter always melted in the spring. "
Tara Westover
Morning
Mountain
Sun
" I do think we have collectively begun to conflate the institutions of education for education itself. Education is an individual's pursuit of understanding and has a lot of implications for that person, for the kind of person that they are. "
Tara Westover
Education
Understanding
Think
" My family always spent the warm months bottling fruit for storage, which Dad said we'd need in the Days of Abomination. "
Tara Westover
Fruit
Always
Family
" I had grown up preparing for the Days of Abomination, watching for the sun to darken, for the moon to drip as if with blood. "
Tara Westover
Moon
Sun
Up
" There's a sense of sovereignty that comes from life on a mountain. "
Tara Westover
Life
Mountain
Sense
" I read a handful of memoirs to get a sense of what the genre meant. I needed to learn the fundamentals of the craft. I had never written a word of narrative. What is a tense shift, what is point of view? I didn't know any of it. "
Tara Westover
Point Of View
Craft
Know
" I had access to books, and I could read... but that more foundational, basic historical awareness, I didn't have any of that. "
Tara Westover
Awareness
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