Get QuoteDark Inspirational Quotes App

" The one good thing about our school was the Cadets; I chose to be in the Navy, purely for the sailor's outfit. A pity we had to give them back. "

Related Quotes:

" The most used piece of kit in my kitchen is my saucepan. I use it every morning to cook my porridge in. The least used piece of equipment? I'd say a food mixer. I've never used it, I don't really know what they're for. "

" I've just swum the length of the Thames. I feel quite tired. "

" It's easier not to make a particular joke in case it offends. But every joke will offend someone, and I've always believed that the audience is bigger than one person. The danger is that things will become bland. "

" Children's books are often seen as the poor relation of literature. But children are just as demanding as adult readers, if not more so. I should know. I'm a children's writer myself. "

" I am a huge fan of 'Doctor Who.' "

" I would recommend that anyone who wants to do comedy on TV to do radio first. "

" It's important when you're married not to forget those things you used to do when you were trying to get her to marry you. You can't send flowers and buy gifts then, when you're married, say, 'Right, get my tea on'. That doesn't go down well. So you've got to keep that level of interest going. "

" We sort of expect to see men in women's clothes. It's part of our culture. The key thing is, it has to be done quite badly. "

" I have a pathological fear of being on my own. When I'm with my own thoughts, I start to unravel myself, and I start to think really dark thoughts, self-destructive thoughts. "

" I can't see why anyone would want to be in politics because you get so much criticism. "

" I'm terribly attention-seeking. It's very different once you get all this attention, though. Because then you want to control it. And you can't exactly. "

" I have always liked shows that have laughter in them. "

" I don't think comedy is necessarily an attack. It's finding humour in life. I don't think if you're making a joke about something you're automatically demeaning it. "

" It's a weird thing because I've been single at the time when I've been successful. That's good and bad. Good, because you meet lots of people, bad because your privacy is infringed, so it's harder to develop things. "

" We sit in a room for months trying to think of funny things. "

" I was quite fat as a kid. And swimming is a sport you can enjoy whatever size you are. If you're fat, running is a pain. I'm not really built for running. "

" I know somebody from university who's called Phil Collins, and I think there's something terribly unfortunate about sharing a name with somebody who either is famous or becomes famous. "

" I've noticed that once you leave London you do kind of become a bit more famous. People in London are a bit too cool for school. It's not so unusual to see someone from London in the street. But outside of London people are a bit more excited to see you and come out and support you. "

" There's something about being a comedian that means you have to not be scared of failing because failing is part of the process. "

" I had a very happy childhood, but I wasn't that happy a child. I liked being alone and creating characters and voices. I think that's when your creativity is developed, when you're young. I liked the world of the imagination because it was an easy place to go to. "

" All human life can be found in an airport. "

" I've done panel shows, which I enjoy, and on those you're recording half-an-hour of TV and sometimes they film for two hours. But with 'Britain's Got Talent,' you're on camera for eight hours, with a large theatre audience watching - and in between you're being filmed for ITV2 as you eat your lunch. "

" Definitely I love women, I love being around women, I find them incredible and intoxicating, and I've never had that feeling I get with women with a man. "

" I haven't traditionally been a family entertainer. "

" When you are doing endurance swimming you just need to take in as many carbs as possible to put on as much weight as you can. Basically you can eat whatever you want, which can be quite fun. Everything is guilt-free. "

" I just want to be happy, have kids, enjoy my life, help others and create some good work. "

" I haven't put much effort into my personal life and blithely believe it will turn out all right in the end. "

" People think writing a children's book is something you could do in an afternoon but it's actually really hard. "

" I know some of my parents' friends think 'Little Britain' is in incredibly poor taste. But swimming the Channel? You can't really say anything negative about that, can you? There's nothing better than making your parents happy. The glee on my father's face that day was amazing. "

" Ricky Gervais would have you believe otherwise, but Sacha Baron Cohen is the most successful British comedian in the world. "