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" There are times a country is so tired of bull that only the truth can provide relief. "

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" I do object to those who jump from political hackery to flackery and expect respect. "

" I left the 'Trib' in 1970 with the feeling that I would never have a career in establishment media of any kind. "

" All anyone needs to enjoy the state legislature is a strong stomach and a complete insensitivity to the needs of the people. As long as you don't think about what that peculiar body should be doing and what it actually is doing to the quality of life in Texas, then it's all marvelous fun. "

" The Internet goes doot-doot-doot - it goes sideways. There's nothing hierarchical about it. And the best thing about it is also the worst thing about it, which is there are no gatekeepers on the Internet. Consequently, there's a whole lot of bad information on the Internet. But I think that sorts itself out over time. "

" In order to understand why George W. Bush doesn't get it, you have to take several strands of common Texas attitude, then add an impressive degree of class-based obliviousness. What you end up with is a guy who sees himself as a perfectly nice fellow - and who is genuinely disconnected from the impact of his decisions on people. "

" Being slightly paranoid is like being slightly pregnant - it tends to get worse. "

" There is more hooey spread about the Second Amendment. It says quite clearly that guns are for those who form part of a well-regulated militia, i.e., the armed forces including the National Guard. The reasons for keeping them away from everyone else get clearer by the day. "

" The uproar of the late '60s - the antiwar movement, black riots, angry women. It was a wonderful time. "

" I think provincialism is an endemic characteristic with mankind, I think everybody everywhere is provincial, but it is particularly striking with Texans, and we tend to be very Texcentric. "

" I'm happy to be called a liberal. "

" Anyone who has ever spent time listening to a legislature knows the astonishing speed at which all presiding officers and reading clerks can spit out the formulaic incantations of parliamentary procedure. "

" People like to help. They like to be able to do something for you. Let them. "

" Texas is still resistant to Howard Johnsons, interstate highways and some forms of phoniness. It is the place least likely to become a replica of everyplace else. It's authentically awful, comic, and weirdly charming, all at the same time. "

" What we call politics now and what most political writers write about is the empathy and the bonding and the word choice and the horse rights, and it has nothing to do with what's really happening to people's lives. "

" I've always found it easier to be funny than to be serious. "

" What I've been telling people is that the doctors are gaining on cancer very rapidly. It's almost become a chronic disease, like diabetes - something you can treat. It doesn't go away, and you're not well in the sense of being over it, but you go on and live your life. "

" I really do think we're going through a period of concentration of ownership of media, and we're starting to see the effects at the editorial level, and it's all bad. This increased pressure for profits every quarter, smaller news hole, less coverage of important stuff - the extent that it's become one giant infotainment industry. "

" The idols of one's adolescence tend to endure - you never forget how you worshipped them. "

" I saw a shrink because I thought I suffered from fear of success. "

" Those who think of freedom in this country as one long, broad path leading ever onward and upward are dead damned wrong. "

" Fourteen-year-old boys are not part of a well-regulated militia. Members of wacky religious cults are not part of a well-regulated militia. Permitting unregulated citizens to have guns is destroying the security of this free state. "

" If you grew up white before the civil rights movement anywhere in the South, all grown-ups lied. They'd tell you stuff like, 'Don't drink out of the colored fountain, dear, it's dirty.' In the white part of town, the white fountain was always covered with chewing gum and the marks of grubby kids' paws, and the colored fountain was always clean. "

" I only aim at the powerful. When satire is aimed at the powerless, it is not only cruel - it's vulgar. "

" So keep fightin' for freedom and justice, beloveds, but don't you forget to have fun doin' it. Lord, let your laughter ring forth. Be outrageous, ridicule the fraidy-cats, rejoice in all the oddities that freedom can produce. "

" Truth is, I've spent much of my life trying, unsuccessfully, to explode the myths about Texas. "

" The most unusual thing about Clinton as a pol is that he listens. Listens and remembers. If he does dance with them that brung him, not them that gave him big money, we will have a populist on our hands. "

" The trouble with capitalism as a system is that only those who have or can get capital can make it work for them, and that leaves out damn near all of us. "

" I dearly love the state of Texas, but I consider that a harmless perversion on my part and discuss it only with consenting adults. "

" There's been a lot of experience with torture in history. It doesn't work. "

" The thing is this: You got to have fun while you're fightin' for freedom, 'cause you don't always win. "