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" Who's been loyal to a Kardashain? "

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" I love to eat. I'm a foodie, and when I'm on vacation, I want to be a foodie with their culture, with their foods. "

" My older brothers have their own children, and they have to go to soccer practice and football practice on the weekends. They're doing their thing and on the weekends, and I'm on the road. The busier we get, the less time we get to see each other. That's why, when we see each other, it's really, really kind of special. "

" If you're at the Comedy Store or the Laugh Factory or the Improv, even two minutes helps. You never know who might be in the audience. "

" What amazes me is that the whole world is fascinated by Kim Kardashian. What's her talent? "

" New York is home. It's so unique that there is no other place like it. "

" Mexicans work so hard. Jamaicans are like, 'Hey mon. Take it easy. You work too 'ard.' Sneak into the country Sunday night, working Monday morning. "

" When I was growing up, I was really into comedy. I listened to a lot of comedy albums. I loved Richard Pryor, but the comic that had the most impact on me was always my brother Chris, who was in the next room. It was tangible. If Chris could make it, I could try. "

" I keep saying this - and I keep putting it off because I get busy - but I keep saying one year I'm gonna tape our Thanksgiving dinner or, like, our Christmas dinner and maybe put it on my website just for people to see how funny it really is, how much fun it really, really is. "

" Every time I go onstage, it's a little less 'Chris Rock's brother.' "

" I'm a skinny kid from Bedford-Stuyvesant, Brooklyn. "

" Every day of my life is a dream goal. "

" I don't understand why black people feel this undying need to want to be down with white people all the time. "

" I can make anything in the room funny in a few seconds. "

" Nothing's given in the Rock family. "

" People say an Oscar validates your career. No, it doesn't. There's more good actors without Oscars than there are with Oscars. "

" You know why kids don't eat fruits? Because fruits don't have any mascots. Every sugary cereal has a bear or a rabbit going , 'Kid! Eat it! Eat it, eat it, eat it!' You're a kid, you're like, 'I got to get that cereal.' "

" My family is just naturally funny. "

" I was on the school bus telling Richard Pryor jokes. I was sneaking, listening to Richard Pryor albums and would go to school the next day, tell all the jokes, and get in trouble because I was cursing. "

" My father drove a truck, and my mother was a school teacher. They wanted their children to go the traditional route: get good grades, go to college, get a job. "

" Like everybody, I started out doing 'bringer' shows - the kind where if you show up with a certain number of people, you get to perform. Sometimes I would actually pay strangers off the street to come in and see my set. "

" I have seven brothers and sisters, and they could all be standup comics! "

Brothers And Sisters

" When you're doing standup, it's just you. It's your written jokes. You perform it however your personality is. "

" I have seven brothers and two sisters, so there was always a little friendly competition in the house. I don't think that's anything unusual with that many siblings. "

" I hate when rappers do interviews. They say stuff like, 'If I wasn't doing this, I'd be dead or in jail.' Like, damn, those are the only two options? What about managing Kinkos? "

" It's part of the gift and the curse of coming behind my brother. I'm not afforded the luxury of just taking a set casual, taking the night off. Because if I bomb, it's, 'Oh, he's not funny - he's just doing it because of his brother.' "

" Any club has more than enough comics, so if you're not there every night talking to the booker, you're not going to get on. You have to be there more than they are. "

" Regular people laugh harder. Industry people are stuffy, very judgmental. "

" I went to a wedding in St. Maarten, and we took a boat ride over to Anguilla for a day. We went to a beach that had the whitest sand I had ever seen before in my life. I was in the water up to the middle of my chest and could still see my feet. It was the clearest water. "

" I know I'm going to be doing standup for the rest of my life. "

" I've always been into stand-up, and I always wanted to be a comic because it was like the dream job as a kid, and my brother, being the patriarch, he paved the way. "