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" You know who you are. If my mother is a nun and someone comes up to me and they go, 'Your mother is a prostitute.' It is not going to bother me, because I know my mother is a nun, she's not a prostitute. "

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" I've never seen anyone more messed up over success than Richard Pryor. For him, it's a constant battle between success in the white world and keeping it real for his black self. "

Paul Mooney

Success

World

Battle

" I got my sense of humor from my grandmother. You know, my grandmother was very funny. "

" I have nothing to do with racism in America; it was here when I got here. "

" People ask me, when was my best time? I always say, 'Today.' "

Paul Mooney

Say

Today

" An audience can be like a pack of wolves. "

Paul Mooney

Audience

Pack

" I think about never losing my voice, never giving in, never selling out, always keeping black, always sticking to the street. Staying neighborhood and not Hollywood. "

" I read a lot of history. The passive Jews in Germany didn't survive. The smart ones got out. "

" I have known Michael Richards for something like 20 years. We're friends. "

" When they were making black films in the '60s and the '70s, everyone knew their place, if you get my drift. You understand? Everyone knew the rules, and everyone knew their place. Everyone knew what to say. They had the written rules in Hollywood film, and the unwritten rules. "

" There's always a message in my comedy. "

" Comedians period, in general, have demons, and myself included. "

" The king of comedy is dead. Richard Pryor was the king of comedy. The rest of them are the king of copycats. "

" Hillary Clinton could say she was a woman and running for president. And Sarah Palin could say she was a woman and running for vice-president. But Obama couldn't say, 'I'm black and I'm running for president.' It couldn't come out of his mouth. He couldn't say that because, if he did, he'd lose votes. "

" I was born a comic. "

" America has a rap sheet. You can't police the world and tell the world how to act when you're just as bad yourself. "

" You white folks see UFOs in your dreams. You don't hear about Martians in Harlem. "

" Arizona has always been anti-black. "

" I'm like the Davy Crockett of comedy... after Davy Crockett opened up the West and helped everybody... they didn't need him anymore. I freed a lot of comics... if I never would have done comedy, it would've been a different art form... I'm sure of it. "

" Robin Williams learned technique. He has the technique of being funny. "

Paul Mooney

Funny

Learned

" If your hair is relaxed, white people are relaxed. If your hair is nappy, they're not happy. "

" There are still plenty of movie people peddling black stereotypes. I guess Tyler Perry's probably the most massively successful. "

" There's no such thing as reverse racism. "

" Handshaking means, 'I don't have a weapon.' "

Paul Mooney

Means

Weapon

" Hollywood doesn't even have respect for itself. Hollywood lies to itself. "

" A woman can tell me about her having a baby, but I'll never know what it is to have a baby. "

" Sometimes, what you do you have no control over because it's predestined. It's gonna happen in spite of you. There's nothing you can do about it. "

" My comedy is a nuclear bomb inside my mind. It's a weapon that's never been tested. It just blows up and flattens everybody. "

Paul Mooney

Just

Mind

" I could drop dead tomorrow, the truth will be here. Truth is forever; when you read our history, truth is forever, and it always outs itself. "

" Whatever that thing is that white people like in blacks, I don't have it. Maybe it's my arrogance or my self-assurance or the way I carry myself, but whatever it is, I don't have it. "

" I think I have a mental nappy attitude. "