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" Dr. Phil is hiding something. Otherwise, why wouldn't he use his last name? "
Garry Shandling
Last
Something
Hiding
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" I don't know how to ground myself without the other actor present. "
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" Dogs are not people. Be leery of any woman who refers to her dogs as her 'kids,' because you'll only end up paying for their schooling. "
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You
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" I have spent a lot of time studying the issue of relationships, how I grew up, my parents' influence on me. I've talked to a therapist,; I've looked inward spiritually at myself, and what it seems to come down to is that I'm a Sagittarius. Please don't make me reveal more than that. It's tough enough as it is. "
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" I'm proud of Larry Sanders and proud of every single person who went on that journey. It's a very special show to me, and I've learned a lot of lessons from it. I need to find something where I can learn some more lessons, and then I'll do that project. "
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Need
Journey
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" I don't know why men are so fascinated with television and I think it has something to do with - if I may judge from my own father, who used to sit and stare at the TV while my mother was speaking to him - I think that's a man's way of tuning out. "
Garry Shandling
Mother
Judge
Man
" I once saw an elaborate landscape in a gallery, drawn in pencil, that took my breath away. Then I realized the artist probably didn't have enough confidence to use a pen. "
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Away
Confidence
Landscape
" Humor is a wonderful way to deal with our suffering because if we can laugh at our troubles, we can feel better. Thich Nhat Hanh is a special man who has helped millions with their suffering with incredible technique. But he doesn't know real suffering, because he has not dated as much as I have. "
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Man
Suffering
Feel
" I watch the news, which is its own reality show. I love 'Curb Your Enthusiasm.' I love it because it's funny and because I realize that I'm happier than Larry David. "
Garry Shandling
Reality
News
Love
" I play basketball on Sundays and I'm a very spiritual guy; I read a lot of Eastern philosophy and I meditate. "
Garry Shandling
Spiritual
Basketball
Philosophy
" I've always felt that the truth is in the silence. "
Garry Shandling
Always
Felt
Truth Is
" I'm too shy to express my sexual needs except over the phone to people I don't know. "
Garry Shandling
Needs
Know
Over
" I don't think I'm severely politically active. I care deeply, and I have my strong personal beliefs. I think America is dancing on thin ice. But I think it's bigger even than a political issue. I wonder about the evolution of the human race and spirit and what our goals and reasons for living are. "
Garry Shandling
Political
Goals
America
" I like to talk on the cell when I do interviews. That way, I double my chances of getting brain cancer: from the cell phone, and from the questions. "
Garry Shandling
Way
Brain
Phone
" My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. But they don't really know me. "
Garry Shandling
Really
Friends
Know
" I think it's one of the main negative emotional ingredients that fuels show business, because there's so much at stake and the fear of failure looms large. "
Garry Shandling
Fear
Business
Failure
" I started boxing for exercise, and on the very first day, the trainer got in the ring with me and said, 'Whoever controls the breathing in the ring controls the fight.' I immediately passed out. "
Garry Shandling
Fight
Boxing
Day
" I am pretty tenacious as a perfectionist in terms of getting something right. "
Garry Shandling
Tenacious
Right
Pretty
" You know it's funny that none of the regular late-night shows now use guest hosts the way Johnny did. No one talks about it much, but it's curious that they don't do it. They would each have to be asked the reason why they don't. "
Garry Shandling
Curious
Funny
Know
" I think I look great in green, and I'm going to start wearing more green. "
Garry Shandling
More
Start
Think
" I like going into nature and that's where I'm happiest. "
Garry Shandling
Happiest
Going
Like
" It's not the hair on your head that matters. It's the kind of hair you have inside. "
Garry Shandling
Inside
Hair
You
" I'm dating a woman now who, evidently, is unaware of it. "
Garry Shandling
Now
Dating
Unaware
" I once made love for an hour and fifteen minutes, but it was the night the clocks are set ahead. "
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Love
Made
Minutes
" I had no idea who I was when I started. I was frightened to death and had no natural performing skills. "
Garry Shandling
Idea
Skills
Started
" Without comedy as a defense mechanism I wouldn't be able to survive. "
Garry Shandling
Without
Comedy
Defense
" 'The Larry Sanders Show,' it's actually about love, which would sound like a paradox at first. But if that love didn't exist, the darker attitudes would not play. You would have a one-dimensional, cynical show, which I don't think the show was. "
Garry Shandling
Play
You
Think
" I keep my scrapbooks in the car. When I come to a stoplight, I start looking through my past. Sometimes I wish the red lights were longer. "
Garry Shandling
Start
Car
Looking
" My first 'Tonight Show' was just one of those things - I mean this seriously - a cosmic, meant-to-be coming together of circumstance. You walk out there to do your first 'Tonight Show': Is the audience going to be hot? Are you going to be on fire? It's like an athlete: Are you going to have your moves at a peak? "
Garry Shandling
You
Athlete
Fire
" I have this very abstract idea in my head. I wouldn't even want to call it stand-up, because stand-up conjures in one's mind a comedian with a microphone standing onstage under a spotlight telling jokes to an audience. The direction I'm going in is eventually, you won't know if it's a joke or not. "
Garry Shandling
You
Audience
Direction
" Here's the thing - I'm single, I haven't been married, I don't have kids yet. If I do have kids I would be interested to see them in my life, so here's a movie for kids and I'm in there and I'm supposed to be kind of funny for kids. "
Garry Shandling
Funny
My Life
Kind