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" I don't want to put meaning on what I do because I don't know what it is. "

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" Your hard work and talent will not pay off. "

" I fully embrace myself as a hypocrite. "

" Life, to me, doesn't feel like a straightforward story; it doesn't make sense for me to get up there and just tell a story. Life feels like what my show feels like: chaotic and strange and disconnected. "

" I'm grateful for every stupid mistake and dumb joke I tried to make. "

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" I write about what I know: teenage dating, overly charged sexuality, all the things that make you uncomfortable. "

" I don't think I've had a job since I worked for my father's construction company. "

" Postmodern comedy doesn't work well with very old audiences, because it's making fun of the comedy they enjoy. "

" I would say don't take advice from people like me who have gotten very lucky. We're very biased. You know, like Taylor Swift telling you to follow your dreams is like a lottery winner telling you, 'Liquidize your assets; buy Powerball tickets - it works!' "

" It feels like we're always juggling many pieces of information at once or trying out many personas at once. It makes life slightly nonlinear. "

" Not enough comedy makes you feel something. "

" I don't try to call myself a poet. But I know that my stuff is pretty literal, in that the themes are pretty simple and on the surface. "

" You can give poor people this royal wedding to watch and make them feel good about themselves, or you can give them something useful like, I don't know... a toaster. "

" You got to take a deep breath and give up. The system is rigged against you. "

Take A Deep Breath

" I know I'm probably digging for fresh fruit in the garbage, and as much as anyone, my attitude is, if stuff's sincere, it's gooey and boring and uninteresting. But it's no way to live. "

" When I see someone filming me, I don't usually think, 'No, man, don't put this up online!' I'd think, 'Hey man, you don't get to go to shows very often, put down the camera and enjoy it!' I love going to theatre and to shows so much. "

" I'll stop when I think I'm not doing good stuff. I'll never exploit something just because people like it. "

" I don't want to monitor my audience too closely, as that can really drive you crazy. "

" My success, literally, is your success figuratively. "

" Once a week, I like to slip into a deep existential depression where I lose all my sense of oneness and self-worth. "

" I think I wear my hypocrisy on my sleeve. I would never say I'm not a complete hypocrite. "