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" I have very non-eccentric hobbies. I like to read, to have dinner with friends, and junk out on TV like everybody else. "
Tara Westover
Friends
Out
TV
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" I think if you're going to abuse someone, you really have to convince them of two things. First, you have to normalise what you're doing, convince them that it's not that bad. And the second thing is to convince them that they deserve it in some way. "
Tara Westover
Doing
Someone
Way
" Although my family attended the same church as everyone in our town, our religion was not the same. I could stand with my family or with the gentiles... but there was no foothold in between. "
Tara Westover
Stand
Church
Family
" My older brother bought textbooks and was able to teach himself enough to go to college. When I was 16, he returned and told me to do the same thing. "
Tara Westover
Enough
Brother
College
" Anger can be a good thing. It's a mechanism that your brain uses to get you out of situations that are bad for you. But in terms of leading a peaceful life, it is not very productive. "
Tara Westover
Anger
Brain
Good
" Anyone who grows up reading the Bible for spiritual reasons, you get accustomed to reading things that are too much for you, too profound for you... Having that belief that you should read them anyway gives you a great advantage over people who only read what they think they can understand. "
Tara Westover
Great
Spiritual
Reading
" When I came to Cambridge, I was involved in the ward for a little bit, but I did have a very gradual process of trying to work out what I thought a good life consisted of. "
Tara Westover
Good
Work
Thought
" We think about education as a stepping stone into a higher socio-economic class, into a better job. And it does do those things. But I don't think that's what it really is. I experienced it as getting access to different ideas and perspectives and using them to construct my own mind. "
Tara Westover
Education
Ideas
Job
" I can't have my family in my life because they are abusive, and I don't have control over that. There is an abusive culture in my family, and I have to turn away from it. "
Tara Westover
Family
My Life
Control
" My mother was a midwife and a herbalist, so we would go on these long walks, looking for yarrow or rosehips or whatever she needed to make her tinctures. "
Tara Westover
Mother
Go
Her
" When I was 17, I went to Brigham Young University. That was the first time I had set foot in a classroom. "
Tara Westover
Classroom
Time
University
" I think a lot of people have grown up with the idea that they can't learn things themselves. They think they need an institution to provide them with knowledge and teach them how to do things. I couldn't disagree more. "
Tara Westover
Learn
Think
People
" Academic writing is such a different way of writing. "
Tara Westover
Different
Writing
Way
" I read a handful of memoirs to get a sense of what the genre meant. I needed to learn the fundamentals of the craft. I had never written a word of narrative. What is a tense shift, what is point of view? I didn't know any of it. "
Tara Westover
Point Of View
Craft
Know
" I had to be - I was in school for probably three or four years before I began taking courses in history and political science, and I just started to realize how big the world was. I mean, when I arrived in college, I didn't know anything. "
Tara Westover
History
Science
World
" If you want to live a miserable life, making your life all about other people is the way to do it. "
Tara Westover
You
Way
Want
" I'm no longer religious, but the Bible fascinates me. Hardly anyone reads it anymore, but it's got everything: it's a book of poetry, it's a book of principle, it's a book of stories, and of myths and of epic tales, a book of histories and a book of fictions, of riddles, fables, parables and allegories. "
Tara Westover
Everything
Book
Bible
" You can miss someone every day and still be glad you don't have to see them. "
Tara Westover
Miss
Day
Every Day
" I had access to books, and I could read... but that more foundational, basic historical awareness, I didn't have any of that. "
Tara Westover
Awareness
Read
More
" I had been educated in the rhythms of the mountain, rhythms in which change was never fundamental, only cyclical. The same sun appeared each morning, swept over the valley, and dropped behind the peak. The snows that fell in winter always melted in the spring. "
Tara Westover
Morning
Mountain
Sun
" I hate the the word 'disempower,' because it seems kind of cliche, but I do think that we take people's ability to self-teach away by creating this idea that that someone else has to do this for you, that you have to take a course, you have to do it in some formal way. "
Tara Westover
Kind
You
People
" We'd had books in my house growing up, but we had never had anything like lectures. I had never written an essay for my mother. I had never taken an exam. Because I was working a lot as a kid, I just hadn't elected to read that much. "
Tara Westover
House
Mother
Kid
" I didn't even have a birth certificate until I was 9 years old, which meant that, according to the state of Idaho and the federal government, I just didn't exist. "
Tara Westover
Years
Just
Government
" I think reading an audiobook is a real skill - for one thing, you have to be able to do impressions and voices, which I cannot do - and it's just not a skill I have. "
Tara Westover
You
Just
Reading
" I felt like we had stories about family loyalty; I didn't feel like we had stories about what to do when you felt that loyalty to your family was in conflict with loyalty to yourself. "
Tara Westover
Yourself
Conflict
Family
" I might just not be a big-city bug. "
Tara Westover
Bug
Just
Might
" When you abuse someone, you limit their perspective, and you trap them in your view of them or your view of the world. "
Tara Westover
Perspective
You
World
" Psychologically, when you hear something a number of times, you start to believe it. "
Tara Westover
Number
You
Start
" Forgiveness isn't just the absence of anger. I think it's also the presence of self-love, when you actually begin to value yourself. "
Tara Westover
Yourself
You
Anger
" I think it's a belief that you can learn something. That's something that I really value from the upbringing I got. "
Tara Westover
Belief
Think
Value
" An education is not so much about making a living as making a person. "
Tara Westover
Education
Person
Much