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" My older brother bought textbooks and was able to teach himself enough to go to college. When I was 16, he returned and told me to do the same thing. "
Tara Westover
Enough
Brother
College
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" Forgiveness isn't just the absence of anger. I think it's also the presence of self-love, when you actually begin to value yourself. "
Tara Westover
Yourself
You
Anger
" At BYU, I discovered history, then historiography. I became fascinated with the study of historians and historical trends, with the idea that the way we remember the past changes and shifts with our own preoccupations. "
Tara Westover
Past
Remember
Changes
" There is a certain panic, at least if you're raised Mormon, to being single at 31. But what they don't tell you is that it can also be kinda great. "
Tara Westover
Being
Great
Tell
" I had been educated in the rhythms of the mountain, rhythms in which change was never fundamental, only cyclical. The same sun appeared each morning, swept over the valley, and dropped behind the peak. The snows that fell in winter always melted in the spring. "
Tara Westover
Morning
Mountain
Sun
" It was a quality of my childhood that everything had these two sides. Even though things could be really beautiful and peaceful one moment, they could also be a bit chaotic or maybe terrifying in another. "
Tara Westover
Childhood
Quality
Moment
" I taught myself algebra and a little grammar, and somehow I scraped a high enough score on the ACT to be admitted to Brigham Young University, even though I had no formal education. "
Tara Westover
Enough
High
Education
" Although my family attended the same church as everyone in our town, our religion was not the same. I could stand with my family or with the gentiles... but there was no foothold in between. "
Tara Westover
Stand
Church
Family
" I think if you're going to abuse someone, you really have to convince them of two things. First, you have to normalise what you're doing, convince them that it's not that bad. And the second thing is to convince them that they deserve it in some way. "
Tara Westover
Doing
Someone
Way
" During my first semester of college, I raised my hand in a class and asked the professor to define a word I didn't know. The word was holocaust, and I had to ask because, until that moment, I had never heard of it. "
Tara Westover
Moment
Know
Class
" I read a handful of memoirs to get a sense of what the genre meant. I needed to learn the fundamentals of the craft. I had never written a word of narrative. What is a tense shift, what is point of view? I didn't know any of it. "
Tara Westover
Point Of View
Craft
Know
" We think love is noble, and in some ways, it is. But in some ways, it isn't. Love is just love. And sometimes people do terrible things because of it. "
Tara Westover
Love Is
Think
Sometimes
" You can miss someone every day and still be glad you don't have to see them. "
Tara Westover
Miss
Day
Every Day
" My brother once lit his leg on fire. And after, when the fire was finally out, his leg was covered in third-degree burns. And we made the decision - or my parents did - not to take him to the hospital but to treat that at home with a salve my mother made of comfrey and lobelia. "
Tara Westover
Brother
Fire
Home
" When you abuse someone, you limit their perspective, and you trap them in your view of them or your view of the world. "
Tara Westover
Perspective
You
World
" I had to be - I was in school for probably three or four years before I began taking courses in history and political science, and I just started to realize how big the world was. I mean, when I arrived in college, I didn't know anything. "
Tara Westover
History
Science
World
" Anyone who grows up reading the Bible for spiritual reasons, you get accustomed to reading things that are too much for you, too profound for you... Having that belief that you should read them anyway gives you a great advantage over people who only read what they think they can understand. "
Tara Westover
Great
Spiritual
Reading
" My mother was a midwife and a herbalist, so we would go on these long walks, looking for yarrow or rosehips or whatever she needed to make her tinctures. "
Tara Westover
Mother
Go
Her
" If you want to live a miserable life, making your life all about other people is the way to do it. "
Tara Westover
You
Way
Want
" I had been raised in the mountains of Idaho by a father who distrusted many of the institutions that people take for granted - public education, doctors and hospitals, and the government. "
Tara Westover
Mountains
People
Father
" I think a lot of people have grown up with the idea that they can't learn things themselves. They think they need an institution to provide them with knowledge and teach them how to do things. I couldn't disagree more. "
Tara Westover
Learn
Think
People
" I didn't read much in high school, maybe because I didn't go to high school. Instead, I worked. "
Tara Westover
Because
School
High School
" Learning in our family was entirely self-directed. "
Tara Westover
Family
Our
Entirely
" I have books I like very much, but I don't think there are any books that everyone should read. I prefer a world in which some people read this, and others read that. "
Tara Westover
Think
Like
Some People
" I have a theory that all abuse, no matter what kind of abuse it is, is foremost an assault on the mind. "
Tara Westover
Theory
Abuse
Mind
" My parents would say to me, 'You can teach yourself anything better than someone else can teach it to you.' That was the whole ethos of my family. "
Tara Westover
Yourself
Better
Family
" I'm no longer religious, but the Bible fascinates me. Hardly anyone reads it anymore, but it's got everything: it's a book of poetry, it's a book of principle, it's a book of stories, and of myths and of epic tales, a book of histories and a book of fictions, of riddles, fables, parables and allegories. "
Tara Westover
Everything
Book
Bible
" When you write, you are alone. It can be a bit of a shock later to discover that people have read what you've written! "
Tara Westover
Bit
You
Write
" My family always spent the warm months bottling fruit for storage, which Dad said we'd need in the Days of Abomination. "
Tara Westover
Fruit
Always
Family
" I had grown up preparing for the Days of Abomination, watching for the sun to darken, for the moon to drip as if with blood. "
Tara Westover
Moon
Sun
Up
" We'd had books in my house growing up, but we had never had anything like lectures. I had never written an essay for my mother. I had never taken an exam. Because I was working a lot as a kid, I just hadn't elected to read that much. "
Tara Westover
House
Mother
Kid