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" I'm agoraphobic. I can't deal with crowds. "

Douglas Coupland

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" I think way back, the '20s or the '30s, when Kodak came out with the Brownie and they put a list of instructions on the box, like how to use this thing, I think someone arbitrarily said, 'Make sure the person in the photograph is smiling.' And we went from that one sort of set of industrial instructions to this whole culture of perkiness. "

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" It's a cliche, but true, that writing is intensely solitary and at times really lonely. I sit in one room and talk to squirrels and blue jays all day. "

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" It's difficult to speak with beautiful people. No matter how hard you try to pretend otherwise, you still want them to like you. "

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" I don't know how anyone gets anything done in cities. How can you live somewhere like London or New York, when there are 81 things to do every night? Awful. Give me solitude and space any time. "

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" I have trouble with seafood because it tastes like a dock. "

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" What if God exists except it turns out he doesn't really like people very much? "

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" A bland smile is like a green light at an intersection, it feels good when you get one, but you forget it the moment you're past it. "

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" With Google I'm starting to burn out on knowing the answer to everything. People in the year 2020 are going to be nostalgic for the sensation of feeling clueless. "

Douglas Coupland

" I think that in the future, clocks won't say three o'clock anymore. They'll just get right to the point and rename three o'clock 'Pepsi.' "

Douglas Coupland

" I always thought of words as art supplies. "

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" Nobody likes being told who or what they are. "

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" Even when you take a holiday from technology, technology doesn't take a break from you. "

Douglas Coupland

" I can't switch time zones any more. London is one of my favourite places, but I'm always so zonked that I can't appreciate it. It's like a six-inch sheet of glass between me and Charing Cross Road. "

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" On TV people look at your hair and then they look at your skin, and then they look at your clothes, and by the time they're listening to what you're saying, you're off the screen. "

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" Remember travel agents? Remember how they just kind of vanished one day? Well, that's where all the other jobs that once made us middle class are going, to that same magical, class-killing, job-sucking wormhole into which travel agency jobs vanished, never to return. "

Douglas Coupland

" I connect fashion to other peoples' elegance, but not my own. I don't think I've ever felt elegant. I've felt appropriate, but never elegant, and I wonder what that must be like. I like it when other people are elegant - I prefer it - but I can't do it myself. I honestly think it's some form of autistic disorder. "

Douglas Coupland

" Flying dreams mean that you're doing the right thing with your life. "

Douglas Coupland

" The thing with bookshelves, no matter how many you have, you always fill them. "

Douglas Coupland

" Writing is largely about time, while visual art is largely about space. "

Douglas Coupland

" If I don't learn something new every year, I go crazy. "

Douglas Coupland

" Art was always my main focus; I fell into writing by accident in the 1980s, writing magazine articles to pay for my studio. I have to put myself into the position of writing; sometimes it doesn't work, and sometimes it works great. "

Douglas Coupland

" The real killers in the business world aren't the ones who aim for the top, it's the ones who aim for two notches below the top. "

Douglas Coupland

" Fate is for losers. "

Douglas Coupland

" I think half the people who get married now have met online. If I think about all the people in my life who married - they met online, online, online. And it makes sense if you think about it, because you fill out this form of 35 things that really define you and - bam - look, you've got two people who match. It works. "

Douglas Coupland

" If you don't change, then what's the point of anything happening to you? "

Douglas Coupland

" Blame is just a lazy person's way of making sense of chaos. "

Douglas Coupland

" I've never gone on Facebook or MySpace. "

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" Cloning is great. If God made the original, then making copies should be fine. "

Douglas Coupland

" Data transmission is no longer something scary you don't want in your backyard. Now you want it directly in front of your house. "

Douglas Coupland

" I've got 911 on speed dial. "

Douglas Coupland