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" What if God exists except it turns out he doesn't really like people very much? "

Douglas Coupland

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" Everyone should have a tailor. David Wilkes, the guy who does my stuff, is like, 'Well you're a writer - do you want a special pen compartment or something?' Bespoke: That's the term you want to get out there. "

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" I've never really seen too much difference between writing or making visual art or designing furniture or clothing. It's still my brain - I'm just using different parts of it for different things. "

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" Storytelling is ultimately a creative act of pattern recognition. Through characters, plot and setting, a writer creates places where previously invisible truths become visible. Or the storyteller posits a series of dots that the reader can connect. "

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" Sometimes the best lighting of all is a power failure. "

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" With 'Worst. Person. Ever.' I knew where it started and where it had to end, but I threw Raymond as many curveballs as I could along the way. He's like the coyote in the 'Road Runner' cartoons. "

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" Blame is just a lazy person's way of making sense of chaos. "

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" New York is a theme park for people with IQs over 108. "

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" You can only fall in love six times in your life. Choose wisely. "

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" I know it's not cat food, but what exactly is it that they put inside of tinned ravioli? "

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" You can never become rich unless you like rich people. "

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" Most time capsules, when they're unearthed, are really awful. There's nothing good in them. "

Douglas Coupland

" Bespoke tailoring: yes! I found this one pair of pants - they're Canali - and brought them into a tailor and said, 'Clone these, dammit.' They just do all the right things. I've got eight pairs in different colors and I never have to think about pants again. The only look otherwise that suits me is, like, the Professor from 'Gilligan's Island.' "

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" A vast percentage of the human race is literally not wired neurologically to get irony. Well more than half of humanity takes life at face value, which is to me terrifying. "

Douglas Coupland

" It's very strange that most people don't care if their knowledge of their family history only goes back three generations. "

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" Good-looking people with strong, fluoridated teeth get things handed to them on platters. "

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" Given the infinite number of coincidences that could happen, very few ever actually do. The universe exists in a coincidence-hating state of anti-fluke. "

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" The whole point of Gen X was, and continues to be, a negation of being forced into Baby Boomerdom against one's will. "

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" If a building looks better under construction than it does when finished, then it's a failure. "

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" On TV people look at your hair and then they look at your skin, and then they look at your clothes, and by the time they're listening to what you're saying, you're off the screen. "

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" I don't know if it's a very smart idea to admire the living. "

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" There's nothing cure or funny or lovable about being cheap. It's a total turn-off. "

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" The reason the future feels odd is because of its unpredictability. If the future didn't feel weirdly unexpected, then something would be wrong. "

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" Self-delusion is one of the funniest things there is. "

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" When Donald Duck traded his wings for arms, was he trading up or trading down? "

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" In the future, IKEA will become an ever more spiritual sanctuary. In the future, your dream life will increasingly look like Google street view. Everyone will be feeling the same way as you, and there's some comfort to be found there. "

Douglas Coupland

" If you're not a tree hugger, then you're a what, a tree hater? "

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" The thing about the end of the world is that not just the West collapses, the whole world does. "

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End Of The World

" The things worth writing about, and the things worth reading about, are the things that feel almost beyond description at the start and are, because of that, frightening. "

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" I think that to acknowledge a new generation is to acknowledge some degree of obsolescence in yourself, and that is very hard to do and often comes with undeniable anger. "

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" The harder you try to become the opposite of your parents, the more quickly you become them. "

Douglas Coupland