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" I'm not a big drinking person and hardly ever have alcohol. Perhaps it's not sweet enough for my sweet tooth. "

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" I am a rubbish flirt. "

" I haven't really ever had to audition for anything. "

" I have had the unfortunate experience of having someone write an unauthorised biography of me. Half of it is lies and the other half is badly written. My feeling is that if I'm going to write my life story, I ought to have my life first. "

" My daughter couldn't care less about me being famous. She finds it revolting and, like a lot of teenagers, is virtually allergic to me. That started at 12 and hasn't gone anywhere yet. "

" I've chosen to stay in a jolly place for most of my life, and that is a lot of who I am. "

" Why would anyone want to be called a size zero or even aspire to being a zero? I don't even understand the thinking behind it, let alone the practicalities. What is all that about? "

" It was my father who taught me to value myself. He told me that I was uncommonly beautiful and that I was the most precious thing in his life. "

" In actual life I am a grumpy old bag. "

" Young people need their own private places which mothers don't belong to, even if they want mother all around the edge of that. "

" I love it when somebody makes me laugh - it's what attracts me to people. "

" I never do any television without chocolate. That's my motto and I live by it. Quite often I write the scripts and I make sure there are chocolate scenes. Actually I'm a bit of a chocolate tart and will eat anything. It's amazing I'm so slim. "

" I've never disliked myself, and my weight has had nothing to do with my self-esteem. "

" I think of myself now as a writer, although I wouldn't go as far as to say 'novelist' because that sounds like a Victorian person. "

" My approach to parenting is that everything is open - everything. I'm not very good at covert, or subtle, and I've had to learn timing. I do blunder in a bit. "

" I've often said the most difficult things I have to say to people through humour. I can very quickly put someone in their place with it. But we all walk away unscathed because there's been some funnies around it, and I'll usually make sure that it comes back at me. "

" Any people whose lives are about the way they look, whether it's fat or thin, are in a dangerous area. "

" Other than my memory being a bit woolly and my knees being a bit creaky, I don't really think there's anything I can't do. "

" If I had been around when Rubens was painting, I would have been revered as a fabulous model. Kate Moss? Well, she would have been the paintbrush. "

" Writing has become my great joy - I simply love it. "

" The person I have admired the most in comedy terms would be Eric Morecambe, who is my total hero. "

" The only time I did not know how to be, physically, was when I lost a lot of weight. That was the only time I didn't understand my body. "

" I do think you are supposed to go through wars with your child because otherwise the tearing apart that has to happen when they go off to lead their own life would be unbearable. "

" I am a kid in the dressing-up box at heart. "

" I've always loved kissing. We all do, don't we? "

" I don't know what the future holds, but I have to be confident about it. It's just the way I am. "

" Turn up your radio. Watch lots of telly and eat loads of choc. Feel guilty. Stay up all night. Learn everything in six hours that has taken you two years to compile. That's how I did it. "

" I know what it's like to struggle for cash. When I went to drama school, I worked as a chambermaid to make ends meet. "

" We have to do a film parody for Comic Relief. We can't decide which film to parody at the moment. Any ideas welcome, but not Spiderman owing to costume being too tight. "

" When I wrote 'Dear Fatty,' I realised that sitting and writing alone is an absolute joy. "

" I want to do something where I play Judi Dench's younger sister or daughter. "