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" In my research, I've interviewed a lot of people who never fit in, who are what you might call 'different': scientists, artists, thinkers. And if you drop down deep into their work and who they are, there is a tremendous amount of self-acceptance. "

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" Faith minus vulnerability and mystery equals extremism. If you've got all the answers, then don't call what you do 'faith.' "

Brene Brown

Answers

Faith

You

" Waking up every day and loving someone who may or may not love us back, whose safety we can't ensure, who may stay in our lives or may leave without a moment's notice, who may be loyal to the day they die or betray us tomorrow - that's vulnerability. "

" Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves, even when we risk disappointing others. "

" We're hardwired for connection. There's no arguing with the bioscience. But we can want it so badly we're trying to hot-wire it. "

" First and foremost, we need to be the adults we want our children to be. We should watch our own gossiping and anger. We should model the kindness we want to see. "

" I don't have to chase extraordinary moments to find happiness - it's right in front of me if I'm paying attention and practicing gratitude. "

" A deep sense of love and belonging is an irreducible need of all people. We are biologically, cognitively, physically, and spiritually wired to love, to be loved, and to belong. When those needs are not met, we don't function as we were meant to. We break. We fall apart. We numb. We ache. We hurt others. We get sick. "

" Vulnerability is the birthplace of connection and the path to the feeling of worthiness. If it doesn't feel vulnerable, the sharing is probably not constructive. "

" As unique as we all are, an awful lot of us want the same things. We want to shake up our current less-than-fulfilling lives. We want to be happier, more loving, forgiving and connected with the people around us. "

" I think our capacity for wholeheartedness can never be greater than our willingness to be broken-hearted. It means engaging with the world from a place of vulnerability and worthiness. "

" I've learned that men and women who are living wholehearted lives really allow themselves to soften into joy and happiness. They allow themselves to experience it. "

" What's the greater risk? Letting go of what people think - or letting go of how I feel, what I believe, and who I am? "

" I hesitate to use a pathologizing label, but underneath the so-called narcissistic personality is definitely shame and the paralyzing fear of being ordinary. "

" I'm not a parenting expert. In fact, I'm not sure that I even believe in the idea of 'parenting experts.' I'm an engaged, imperfect parent and a passionate researcher. I'm an experienced mapmaker and a stumbling traveler. Like many of you, parenting is by far my boldest and most daring adventure. "

" When we're looking for compassion, we need someone who is deeply rooted, is able to bend and, most of all, embraces us for our strengths and struggles. "

" We judge people in areas where we're vulnerable to shame, especially picking folks who are doing worse than we're doing. "

" When you get to a place where you understand that love and belonging, your worthiness, is a birthright and not something you have to earn, anything is possible. "

" My husband's a pediatrician, so he and I talk about parenting all the time. You can't raise children who have more shame resilience than you do. "

" Vulnerability is not weakness. And that myth is profoundly dangerous. "

" The uncertainty of parenting can bring up feelings in us that range from frustration to terror. "

" To me, constructive criticism is when people take ownership of their ideas. That's why I don't listen to anything that's anonymous. But it's hard; when there's something hurtful out there, I still want to read it over and over and memorize it and explain my point of view to the person. "

Brene Brown

Want

Ideas

" You're imperfect, and you're wired for struggle, but you are worthy of love and belonging. "

" I spent a lot of years trying to outrun or outsmart vulnerability by making things certain and definite, black and white, good and bad. My inability to lean into the discomfort of vulnerability limited the fullness of those important experiences that are wrought with uncertainty: Love, belonging, trust, joy, and creativity to name a few. "

" Many people think of perfectionism as striving to be your best, but it is not about self-improvement; it's about earning approval and acceptance. "

" Live-tweeting your bikini wax is not vulnerability. Nor is posting a blow-by-blow of your divorce . That's an attempt to hot-wire connection. But you can't cheat real connection. It's built up slowly. It's about trust and time. "

" To me, a leader is someone who holds her- or himself accountable for finding potential in people and processes. And so what I think is really important is sustainability. "

" I was raised in a family where vulnerability was barely tolerated: no training wheels on our bicycles, no goggles in the pool, just get it done. And so I grew up not only with discomfort about my own vulnerability, I didn't care for it in other people either. "

" I've learned a lot since I was a new mother. My approach to struggle and shame now is to talk to yourself like you'd talk to someone you love and reach out to tell your story. "

" As a shame researcher, I know that the very best thing to do in the midst of a shame attack is totally counterintuitive: Practice courage and reach out! "

" The moment someone asks you to do something you don't have the time or inclination to do is fraught with vulnerability. "