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" I was raised in a family where vulnerability was barely tolerated: no training wheels on our bicycles, no goggles in the pool, just get it done. And so I grew up not only with discomfort about my own vulnerability, I didn't care for it in other people either. "

Brene Brown

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" To me, a leader is someone who holds her- or himself accountable for finding potential in people and processes. And so what I think is really important is sustainability. "

" When you get to a place where you understand that love and belonging, your worthiness, is a birthright and not something you have to earn, anything is possible. "

" The moment someone asks you to do something you don't have the time or inclination to do is fraught with vulnerability. "

" Perfectionism is not the same thing as striving to be our best. Perfectionism is not about healthy achievement and growth; it's a shield. "

" Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves, even when we risk disappointing others. "

" When you stop caring what people think, you lose your capacity for connection. When you're defined by it, you lose our capacity for vulnerability. "

" As unique as we all are, an awful lot of us want the same things. We want to shake up our current less-than-fulfilling lives. We want to be happier, more loving, forgiving and connected with the people around us. "

" As a shame researcher, I know that the very best thing to do in the midst of a shame attack is totally counterintuitive: Practice courage and reach out! "

" Normally, when someone we love is turning away from a struggle, we self-protect by also turning away. That's definitely my first response. I think change is more likely to happen if both partners have common language and a shared lens to see problems. "

" The truth is: Belonging starts with self-acceptance. Your level of belonging, in fact, can never be greater than your level of self-acceptance, because believing that you're enough is what gives you the courage to be authentic, vulnerable and imperfect. "

" We're hardwired for connection. There's no arguing with the bioscience. But we can want it so badly we're trying to hot-wire it. "

" Faith minus vulnerability and mystery equals extremism. If you've got all the answers, then don't call what you do 'faith.' "

" Waking up every day and loving someone who may or may not love us back, whose safety we can't ensure, who may stay in our lives or may leave without a moment's notice, who may be loyal to the day they die or betray us tomorrow - that's vulnerability. "

" Men walk this tightrope where any sign of weakness illicits shame, and so they're afraid to make themselves vulnerable for fear of looking weak. "

" Our need for certainty in an endeavor as uncertain as raising children makes explicit 'how-to-parent' strategies both seductive and dangerous. "

" In my research, I've interviewed a lot of people who never fit in, who are what you might call 'different': scientists, artists, thinkers. And if you drop down deep into their work and who they are, there is a tremendous amount of self-acceptance. "

" Ironically, parenting is a shame and judgment minefield precisely because most of us are wading through uncertainty and self-doubt when it comes to raising our children. "

" To me, constructive criticism is when people take ownership of their ideas. That's why I don't listen to anything that's anonymous. But it's hard; when there's something hurtful out there, I still want to read it over and over and memorize it and explain my point of view to the person. "

Brene Brown

Want

Ideas

" I carry a small sheet of paper in my wallet that has written on it the names of people whose opinions of me matter. To be on that list, you have to love me for my strengths and struggles. "

" A deep sense of love and belonging is an irreducible need of all people. We are biologically, cognitively, physically, and spiritually wired to love, to be loved, and to belong. When those needs are not met, we don't function as we were meant to. We break. We fall apart. We numb. We ache. We hurt others. We get sick. "

" You cannot talk about race without talking about privilege. And when people start talking about privilege, they get paralyzed by shame. "

" My husband's a pediatrician, so he and I talk about parenting all the time. You can't raise children who have more shame resilience than you do. "

" There is no innovation and creativity without failure. Period. "

" When we're looking for compassion, we need someone who is deeply rooted, is able to bend and, most of all, embraces us for our strengths and struggles. "

" One thing that I tell people all the time is, 'I'm not going to answer a call from you after nine o'clock at night or before nine o'clock in the morning unless it's an emergency.' "

" I think our capacity for wholeheartedness can never be greater than our willingness to be broken-hearted. It means engaging with the world from a place of vulnerability and worthiness. "

" Shame is the most powerful, master emotion. It's the fear that we're not good enough. "

" Guilt is just as powerful, but its influence is positive, while shame's is destructive. Shame erodes our courage and fuels disengagement. "

" We judge people in areas where we're vulnerable to shame, especially picking folks who are doing worse than we're doing. "