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" Most novels, I find, are three times longer than they need to be. Very little happens, and I don't want to waste my time with them. "
Chuck Palahniuk
Little
Want
Time
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" My father worked for the railroad, and whenever a train crashed, we would go as a family and steal food from the boxcars. One year we stole a case of butterscotch pudding that was for export to Israel. It took us years to get through. "
Chuck Palahniuk
Train
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Railroad
" My grandfather was hit over the head by a crane boom in Seattle. Some of the family claimed he was never a violent, crazy person before that. Some say he was. It depends who you believe. "
Chuck Palahniuk
Crazy
Believe
You
" Some of the best ideas I get seem to happen when I'm doing mindless manual labor or exercise. I'm not sure how that happens, but it leaves me free for remarkable ideas to occur. "
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Ideas
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Doing
" With a book, you're guaranteed the audience has a certain skill level and that the audience has to make an ongoing effort to consume this product and that the project is being consumed by just one person at a time. I really want to play to that strength because it's one of the few advantages books still have. "
Chuck Palahniuk
Play
Book
You
" I wanted to write about the moment when your addictions no longer hide the truth from you. When your whole life breaks down. That's the moment when you have to somehow choose what your life is going to be about. "
Chuck Palahniuk
You
Life
Moment
" I thought 'Fight Club' was great as David Fincher's version. "
Chuck Palahniuk
Great
Version
Club
" Writing in public gives you that access to a junkyard of details all around you. "
Chuck Palahniuk
You
Access
Details
" I haven't had television since 1991, and it definitely influences me. As a child of the 1970s, I couldn't hold a narrative in my head; I was lucky if I could hold a joke in my head, because every time you turn on television or radio, it wipes the slate clean - at least in my case. "
Chuck Palahniuk
Child
Lucky
Me
" Every author has to eventually write a food book. "
Chuck Palahniuk
Book
Food
Write
" Sometimes the very best way to deal with unpleasant things is to depict them in ways that allow people to laugh at them and destroy the power of unsayable things, rather than refusing to acknowledge them. "
Chuck Palahniuk
People
Laugh
Best
" If you knew that your life was merely a phase or short, short segment of your entire existence, how would you live? Knowing nothing 'real' was at risk, what would you do? You'd live a gigantic, bold, fun, dazzling life. You know you would. That's what the ghosts want us to do - all the exciting things they no longer can. "
Chuck Palahniuk
Fun
Chance
Short
" If you flee from the things you fear, there's no resolution. "
Chuck Palahniuk
You
Fear
Flee
" The answer is there is no answer. "
Chuck Palahniuk
Answer
" Arguing that God doesn't exist would be like people in the 10th century arguing that germs and microbes didn't exist because they couldn't see them. "
Chuck Palahniuk
Because
Like
People
" One thing I really envy about my friends who have kids is that as their children develop, they're able to revisit their own developmental stages and recognise themselves and undo a lot of things they decided. "
Chuck Palahniuk
Envy
Things
Children
" I used to work in a funeral home to feel good about myself, just the fact that I was breathing. "
Chuck Palahniuk
Home
Feel Good
Good
" Think about George Orwell's three-minute hate from the novel '1984' and how that left everyone sort of exhausted and able to live their boring humdrum lives. If our lives are going to continue being unfulfilled and boring, perhaps we do need some sort of short-term violent chaos incorporated into them, to make them more palatable. "
Chuck Palahniuk
Chaos
Boring
Live
" I think America is just so in love with conflict. "
Chuck Palahniuk
America
Conflict
Just
" My personal theory is that younger audiences disdain books - not because those readers are dumber than past readers, but because today's reader is smarter. "
Chuck Palahniuk
Past
Today
Theory
" The only difference between suicide and martyrdom is press coverage. "
Chuck Palahniuk
Suicide
Only
Press
" Every woman is just a different kind of problem. "
Chuck Palahniuk
Different
Just
Kind
" All God does is watch us and kill us when we get boring. We must never, ever be boring. "
Chuck Palahniuk
Boring
Never
God
" Maybe humans are just the pet alligators that God flushed down the toilet. "
Chuck Palahniuk
God
Toilet
Pet
" Masochism is a valuable job skill. "
Chuck Palahniuk
Valuable
Skill
Job
" Give me rampant intellectualism as a coping mechanism. "
Chuck Palahniuk
Coping
Mechanism
Me
" The first step to eternal life is you have to die. "
Chuck Palahniuk
First Step
Die
First
" When I first started writing, it was me alone with a computer in my apartment. I hated the time away from other people, and my writing sucked. Now I have a laptop; I can do the most tedious part of my job in a public place. "
Chuck Palahniuk
Time
Alone
Me
" I don't do much more than organise other people's ideas and insights and thoughts, and sort of harvest them, and inventory them and present them. "
Chuck Palahniuk
More
Thoughts
People
" My goal is never to make fun of religion. "
Chuck Palahniuk
Make
Goal
Fun
" So much of 'Fight Club' was a rant against fathers. "
Chuck Palahniuk
Fight
Much
Club