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" My friend and I founded the New York Arab-American Comedy Festival to counter the negative images of Arabs in media. And we always made sure that the comedy came first. So we weren't a bunch of Arabs trying to be funny. We were a bunch of comedians who just happened to be of Arab heritage. "

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" Today, I am a touring standup comic who cannot stand up. Within three minutes, I begin to wilt, lose my balance, and topple over. I can tap dance and run in heels, but I need to use a wheelchair to navigate airports. "

Maysoon Zayid

I Am

Stand Up

Today

" I was the girl who did everybody's homework, but I was also, like, student council president and yearbook editor and, like, all-around overachiever. Like, I'm disabled, but I can do anything. "

" The most obvious thing I do is I don't wear a burqa, and I'm definitely not oppressed. Plus, I'm quite obviously an independent thinker, which means as soon as I walk on stage, I dispel a lot of those stereotypes. "

" My parents couldn't afford physical therapy, so they sent me to dancing school. I learned how to dance in heels, which means I can walk in heels. And I'm from Jersey, and we are really concerned with being chic, so if my friends wore heels, so did I. "

Maysoon Zayid

Parents

I Can

" As far as characters that are written as Muslims, we're only seeing one dimension. It's either the good Muslim who is helping the FBI, or the taxi driver-terrorist bundled in one. "

" With George Bush, I had absolutely no fear that I would ever be silenced. With Donald Trump, I think I could get dragged offstage and have people actually cheer it. I never thought that would happen in America. "

" I'm a person who watches TV all the time - all the time; I love TV. And I really think that the media heavily influences how we as a society behave towards each other. And one of the things that I find to be lacking on television are positive images of diversity. "

" If there was an Oppression Olympics, I would win the gold medal. I'm Palestinian, Muslim, I'm female, I'm disabled, and I live in New Jersey. "

" If you're disabled, and you're trying to achieve your dreams, accept the fact right now that you have to work 500 times more than the average bear next to you. Stop bucking for sympathy, put on your titanium legs, and run. "

" It became very obvious to me that in the United States of America, a fluffy ethnic disabled chick was never going to get a job unless she did stand-up. "

" In the interest of full disclosure, let me state that I hate Hamas. They embody everything that I, as a human being, am fighting against: oppression, religious rule, and patriarchy. They empower Israel while dividing the Palestinians. "

Maysoon Zayid

Empower

Hate

" I shake all the time. It's exhausting and causes chronic pain in my joints and muscles. It is also the only life I have ever known. I use yoga, dance, nutrition, and breathing to help manage my symptoms. "

" Palestine-Israel is such a ludicrous issue. "

Maysoon Zayid

Ludicrous

Issue

" If you elect a religious party into power, you no longer have a democracy. "

" From fear to bonding with the audience to getting more open - that's what standup is. It humanises you. "

" I'm very much inspired by things that anger me. If I see bigotry, stupidity, or injustice on the news, I'm inspired to find a way to make it into something comedic and relatable. Anger inspires me. Stupidity inspires me. My family inspires me. My accountant inspires me. Everything and anything, really. "

" I'm not trying to represent all Muslim women. I'm trying to give voice to the silent majority. Unfortunately, I'm a bit loony. "

" We have been sold a Muslim boogeyman. We are buying into it, and we are terrified, and that terror is causing people to lash out at comedians like myself or women wearing hijabs, or anyone who seems to defend equality for Muslims worldwide. "

Maysoon Zayid

Women

Equality

" I think religion is very personal. I definitely identify as Muslim. I consider myself practicing, but I don't think people who observe me from the outside would think of me as devout, and that doesn't bother me because one of the beauties of Islam is the fact that it is personal: you read the Koran, and what you believe is what you believe. "

" Palestinians are Christian, Muslims, atheist, Buddhist - you name it. And the majority I know have nothing against Judaism and everything against Israeli oppression. "

" I'm not here to impose Sharia law, and I'm not here to have a message about disability being inspirational - I'm here to make people laugh. But when I can layer things and make people not only laugh but question, make people not only laugh but be offended... I have to do that. "

" The people that I grew up with had no problem with my faith. They did, however, seem very concerned that I would starve to death during Ramadan. I would explain to them that I have enough fat to live off of for three whole months, so fasting from sunrise to sunset is a piece of cake. "

" March is Cerebral Palsy Awareness Month. Don't feel bad if you did not know that. I didn't, either, until someone recently slapped a picture of a green ribbon and a message wishing me a 'Happy CP Awareness Month' on my Facebook page. I always thought March was Women's History Month. "

" I spent my summers in a war zone because my parents were afraid that if we didn't go back to Palestine every single summer, we'd grow up to be Madonna. "

" Not wearing hijab has seriously, seriously hurt my career. Mass media wants to see a woman in a veil. But I think it helps me because it makes it easier for my audience to relate to me. I'm not the scary 'other' they keep seeing on 'Fox News.' "

Maysoon Zayid

Career

Media

" Comedy is free therapy. And if it's done well, the audience and the comic take turns being the doctor as well as the patient. "

" I am a hardcore foodie, which means I love to eat. I was also born with cerebral palsy, which means I shake all the time - so cooking is not my thing, as I am banned from being around knives and fire. Those who cannot cook, watch, and I am obsessed with cooking shows. "

" I have to tell you, it's very boring, but before I did yoga, I was a stand-up comedian who can't stand up. And now I can stand on my head. "

" I was able to walk at 5. I had to be able to walk in order to be mainstreamed into public school. And my father worked day and night to teach me how to walk. And I think what's so amazing about this is the fact that he was told that I would never walk. And he decided that he was going to try. "

" I've had the same best friends since I was five years old; they're still my best friends. I was never bullied. I was never made fun of. "