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" My only writing ritual is to shave my head bald between writing the first and second drafts of a book. If I can throw away all my hair, then I have the freedom to trash any part of the book on the next rewrite. "

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" The pretentiousness of literature really annoys me; the way a writer is held as this sort of magical person to be revered on the stage. Everything I do on tour is to try and destroy that pretense. "

Chuck Palahniuk

Magical

Try

Person

" I thought 'Fight Club' was great as David Fincher's version. "

" You have no idea what it is like to constantly disappoint people. You see it the moment you meet them. You see in their eyes that they expected something so entirely different, and here they are meeting... you. "

" If there had been zombies on the iceberg when the Titanic hit it, that would have made a much better movie. "

" What we don't understand we can make mean anything. "

" Once religion has been dismissed by primarily an intellectual class of people, we lose the really useful social functions of religion... What replaces it might be worse than what we throw away. "

" My policy is to not read any reviews. "

" I am enormously uncool. I've made a cottage industry of being uncool. And I'm fine with that. "

Chuck Palahniuk

Made

Cottage

" I'm trying to make order out of chaos, trying to find some way of rationalising the horrific things that people do or the way the world is. "

" The unreal is more powerful than the real, because nothing is as perfect as you can imagine it, because it's only intangible ideas, concepts, beliefs, fantasies that last. Stone crumbles, wood rots. People, well, they die. But things as fragile as a thought, a dream, a legend, they can go on and on. "

" At school I was lazy. But I started working when I was 15, washing dishes at a local truck stop restaurant. I was really, really bored with school, and I wanted to get a job as fast as I could. School was just so easy. There was just no challenge to it. "

" To be honest, I hate silence. "

" The young men, they look to me for a story they can get nowhere else, a challenging risky story. "

" I've always been very curious about fringe cultures where people temporarily adopt a different social model or way of presenting themselves. "

" I know that I'm going to die and that you're going to die. I can't do anything about that. But I can explore it through a metaphor and make a kind of funny, dark story about it, and in doing so, really exhaust and research as many aspects of it as I can imagine. And in a way, that does give me some closure. "

Chuck Palahniuk

Research

Story

" My writing process isn't a very organized thing. "

" As we grow older I always think, why didn't I do more when I was young, why didn't I risk more? "

" Maybe we have to break everything to make something better out of ourselves. "

" I live by fallacy. 'If I get enough nice Ikea furniture, I'll be a grown-up.' Then I catch myself. Or, 'If I get off by myself, away from the stress of modern life, I'll be OK.' Then I catch myself. "

" People would ask me to autograph their bodies and then the next time I'd see them on tour they'd have my autograph tattooed. I decided I wouldn't write on people anymore, but I'd give them arms and legs and if they wanted those autographed I'd do that. "

Chuck Palahniuk

See

Legs

" David Fincher is a genius. "

Chuck Palahniuk

Genius

David

" Mr. Olsen in the fifth grade made me want to be a writer. He said, 'Chuck, you do this really well. And this is much better than setting fires, so keep it up.' That made me a writer. "

" I think Chris Brown gets kind of dismissed as a gay writer, and I think Chris's books are really, really smart. I wish his books sold a little more widely. "

" My personal theory is that younger audiences disdain books - not because those readers are dumber than past readers, but because today's reader is smarter. "

" If you knew that your life was merely a phase or short, short segment of your entire existence, how would you live? Knowing nothing 'real' was at risk, what would you do? You'd live a gigantic, bold, fun, dazzling life. You know you would. That's what the ghosts want us to do - all the exciting things they no longer can. "

" Portland is quickly becoming one of those lovely, lush Third World countries where kinda-rich people retire with their money. "

" My publisher's been shipping me to comic-cons, and it seems that my readership overlaps perfectly with the comic-con crowd. "

" What is the real purpose behind the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny and Santa Claus? They seem like greater steps toward faith and imagination, each with a payoff. Like cognitive training exercises. "

" I like to get people moving and jumping. I think it's good to add more emotion and chaos. "

" I don't know if you ever really feel like you've made it. "

Chuck Palahniuk

Made

Know