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" Racists seem obsessed by the idea that illegal workers - the hardest-working, poorest people in America - are somehow getting away with something, sneaking goodies that should be for Americans. You can always avoid this problem by having no social services. This is the refreshing Texas model, and it works a treat. "

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" Behind a smoke screen of high-profile female appointees and soothing slogans, George W. Bush is waging war on women. "

Molly Ivins

Soothing

Women

Smoke

" Laws were changed and regulations repealed until an Enron can set sail without responsibility, supervision, or accountability. "

" Rove, of course, is an exceptionally good, exceptionally skillful campaign guy, and Bush himself is really gifted at the political end of politics. But he's always been, as he says, misunderestimated. "

" Am I the only person covering politics who ever noticed that Newt Gingrich is actually a nincompoop? "

" There's been a lot of experience with torture in history. It doesn't work. "

" Being slightly paranoid is like being slightly pregnant - it tends to get worse. "

" The reason there is no noblesse oblige about Dubya is because he doesn't admit to himself or anyone else that he owes his entire life to being named George W. Bush. He didn't just get a head start by being his father's son - it remained the single most salient fact about him for most of his life. "

" One of the things I said was that I had been in great hopes that I would become a better person as a result of confronting my own mortality, but it actually never happened. I didn't become a better person. "

" Anyone who has ever spent time listening to a legislature knows the astonishing speed at which all presiding officers and reading clerks can spit out the formulaic incantations of parliamentary procedure. "

" So keep fightin' for freedom and justice, beloveds, but don't you forget to have fun doin' it. Lord, let your laughter ring forth. Be outrageous, ridicule the fraidy-cats, rejoice in all the oddities that freedom can produce. "

" Be outrageous, ridicule the fraidy-cats, rejoice in all the oddities that freedom can produce. "

" One of the few things I like about Bill Clinton is that he has very good manners. If his momma were still alive, I would congratulate her. "

" There is more hooey spread about the Second Amendment. It says quite clearly that guns are for those who form part of a well-regulated militia, i.e., the armed forces including the National Guard. The reasons for keeping them away from everyone else get clearer by the day. "

Molly Ivins

Second

Away

" Guns do kill. Unlike cars, that is all they do. "

Molly Ivins

Unlike

Guns

" I only aim at the powerful. When satire is aimed at the powerless, it is not only cruel - it's vulgar. "

" The uproar of the late '60s - the antiwar movement, black riots, angry women. It was a wonderful time. "

" A teenage foot that never tapped to 'Heartbreak Hotel' in the '50s probably belonged to a hopeless grind. "

" Truth is, I've spent much of my life trying, unsuccessfully, to explode the myths about Texas. "

" The thing is this: You got to have fun while you're fightin' for freedom, 'cause you don't always win. "

" Preemptive war is what Israel did in '67 with Arab armies on its borders. "

" The Federal Reserve system obviously doesn't work anymore - they keep lowering the federal discount rate, and all that happens is that the banks are making a fortune, and the old folks' CDs are getting chewed up. "

" We should all laugh more at our elected officials - it's good for us and good for them. "

Molly Ivins

Elected Officials

Laugh

" From orphanages to space colonies, it was all shallow but endearingly enthusiastic futurism. Gingrich was the kind of person who read a book or two on something and would then be quite afire as to how this was going to fit into some shining future. "

" The only reason to have a positive mental attitude is that it makes life better. It doesn't cure cancer. "

" It is possible to read the history of this country as one long struggle to extend the liberties established in our Constitution to everyone in America. "

" Here's the deal on Texas. It's big. So big, there's about five distinct and different places here, separated from one another geologically, topographically, botanically, ethnically, culturally, and climatically. "

" The danger of the blogosphere is reading only those you agree with. While there are right-wing blogs that are entertaining freak shows, it's hard to find substantial journalism there. "

" I'm happy to be called a liberal. "

Molly Ivins

Happy

Liberal

" Satire is a weapon, and it can be quite cruel. "

" I never saw anything funnier than Texas politics. "