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" The number one rule of thieves is that nothing is too small to steal. "

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" Complainant received immediate lacerations of the credibility. "

" Politicians attend dinners at hotels with contractors. Bankers discuss interest rates at lunch. "

" Politics, where fat, bald, disagreeable men, unable to be candidates themselves, teach a president how to act on a public stage. "

" Why something in the public interest such as television news can be fought over, like a chain of hamburger stands, eludes me. "

" I played football. I played trumpet. I could draw. "

" I busted out of the place in a hurry and went to a saloon and drank beer and said that for the rest of my life I'd never take a job in a place where you couldn't throw cigarette butts on the floor. I was hooked on this writing for newspapers and magazines. "

" If a man, for private profit, tears at the public news, does so with the impatience of one who thinks he actually owns the news you get, it is against the national interest. "

" The professional arsonist builds vacant lots for money. "

" Newspapers are so boring. How can you read a newspaper that starts with a 51-word lead sentence? "

" Rage is the only quality which has kept me, or anybody I have ever studied, writing columns for newspapers. "

" Trump is larger than life. "

" You can get some work, some jobs that will bore you until you're dead. So you better look for something that's got a little tingle to it. "

" Some time ago, I made a basic decision about the way in which I was going to live the little of life available to me The idea was to place myself in the presence of only those people who give off the warm, friendly vibrations which soothe the coating on my nerves. Life never was long enough to provide time for enemies. "

" I'm the best person ever to have a column in this business. There's never been anybody in my league. "

" The first funeral for Andrew Goodman was at night and it was a lot of work. To begin with they had to kill him. "

" I don't know any other columnists, and I don't know what they do. I work the single! And nobody does what I do, anyway. "

" A politician finds anything to do with racial problems far more frightening than a gun. "

" Don't try to tell Namath's people on First Avenue about Babe Ruth, because they don't even know the name. In fact, with the young, you can forget all of baseball. The sport is gone. But if you ever have seen Ruth, and then you see Namath, you know there is very little difference. "

" Media, the plural of mediocrity. "

" I became a copy boy. Not for long. I started writing stories. "

" Those of Manhattan are the brokers on Wall Street and they talk of people who went to the same colleges; those from Queens are margin clerks in the back offices and they speak of friends who live in the same neighborhood. "

" Speaks cheerful English and in the past has written this language with a paintbrush that talks. "

" Don't call me a journalist; I hate the word. It's pretentious! "

" When you stop drinking, you have to deal with this marvelous personality that started you drinking in the first place. "