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" This is the kind of world I was born in, one in which I had only one reason for existence: pleasing others. "

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" I buy women shoes and they use them to walk away from me. "

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" When I say I do, the justice of the peace replies, 'I know, I know...' "

" I don't regret anything I've ever done. I only wish I could have done more. "

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" You've got to recognize, there will never be another you. It has nothing to do with ego; it happens to be the truth. There will never be another person the same. There'll never be another you. "

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" I tried to make up for being 5 ft. 3 in. by affecting a strut and adopting the voice of a much bigger man... dating tall, beautiful women... But nothing I could do, after Ava had left me, would add a single inch to my height. "

" I think without a doubt there will never be a voice like Judy Garland. "

" I was about six years old when I did 'Orchids and Ermine.' They dressed me in a suit, put a mustache under my nose, a cigar in my mouth, a cane in my hand, and a hat on my head. "

" I don't drink. I don't smoke. I don't drink coffee. Starbucks is not going to make any money on me. "

" Always get married in the morning. That way if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted the whole day. "

" I was a gnomish prodigy - half-human, half-goblin, man-child, child-man. "

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" You always pass failure on your way to success. "

" I came from a poor family. My father was from Glasgow, Scotland; my mother's brothers were brakemen on the railroad. We didn't have anything but mush for breakfast. "

" A lot of people have asked me how short I am. Since my last divorce, I think I'm about $100,000 short. "

" I was born in Brooklyn, delivered by a Chinese doctor on a table in a boarding house on Sept. 23, 1920. "

" Sometimes the transition from being in control of your life to having absolutely no control is swift, but other times it is so gradual that you wonder exactly when it truly began. "