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" Good liars are skilled at reading others well, putting them at ease, managing their own emotions, and intuitively sensing how others perceive them. "
Pamela Meyer
Own
Reading
Emotions
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" White lies keep social dignity intact and are far more prevalent than most people realize. Several studies have found that an average person is lied to from 10 to 200 times a day - mostly just to keep a conversation going, to avoid conflict, or to establish a connection with someone. "
Pamela Meyer
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Conversation
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" Nothing is certain in life but death and taxes. And in Donald Trump's case, lies. "
Pamela Meyer
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Life
Case
" While it can feel unfair to have to make a career decision because of a morally deficient boss, doing so can sometimes lead you in the right direction, if a bit faster than you otherwise would have preferred. "
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" Contempt is the only asymmetrical facial expression, so it's easy to spot once you're aware of its signs. One researcher has successfully tracked it in couples as a predictor of divorce. When someone is angry at you, you've still got traction with them, but when they display contempt, you've been dismissed. "
Pamela Meyer
Someone
Easy
Divorce
" One immutable trait of the gullible is that they are credulous to a fault. Though no-doubt well-meaning, the naive are Trump's base. "
Pamela Meyer
Naive
Gullible
Fault
" Truth-tellers who expect others to believe them tend to speak naturally and un-self-consciously. But if they don't expect to be believed, they may try too hard to seem honest. Unfortunately, the result makes them sound less believable. Obviously, then, not every oddly phrased statement is a lie. "
Pamela Meyer
Result
Believe
Honest
" By the time we enter this work world and we're breadwinners, we enter a world that's just cluttered with spam, fake, digital friends, partisan media, ingenious identity thieves, world-class Ponzi schemers - a deception epidemic. "
Pamela Meyer
Identity
World
Work
" Trump is a master obfuscator. Like an octopus escaping a predator, he releases a cloud of ink when called to the carpet on one of his many lies. His strategy? Obfuscate, then reference others. 'Millions agree,' 'everyone knows,' 'many have done it.' "
Pamela Meyer
Cloud
Done
Everyone
" Business is a battlefield. You need to be able to go to battle with your team members. Like the military. Know them, trust them, and know who you're working with. "
Pamela Meyer
Battle
Know
Business
" If you're an average married couple, you're going to lie to your spouse in one out of every 10 interactions. Now, you may think that's bad. If you're unmarried, that number drops to three. "
Pamela Meyer
Bad
Think
You
" Con men look for human frailty to exploit. This is most often greed. Trump found a different vice: anger. The emotional are always the most susceptible to manipulation. "
Pamela Meyer
Greed
Human
Look
" Politicians aren't special. They lie the same way we all do, revealing their true nature under pressure. "
Pamela Meyer
Special
Pressure
Nature
" It's counterintuitive to take a long time to hire someone, but it will save you enormous amounts of time and money later. Our biggest mistakes in hiring stem from speed. "
Pamela Meyer
Money
Speed
Time
" Genuine expressions of emotion rarely persist longer than five seconds and almost never longer than 10. A fixed smile is likely to conceal anger, anxiety, or some other negative emotion. "
Pamela Meyer
Negative
Anger
Anxiety
" Truth in our society often takes a back seat to securing gainful consequences. "
Pamela Meyer
Consequences
Seat
Society
" Study after study shows that people are much less likely to lie to a person they consider to be honest. "
Pamela Meyer
Lie
Study
Person
" Research indicates that a pause tends to be a signal that a cluster of deceptive cues is on its way. This is a key reason why voters routinely associate Trump with authenticity: He rarely pauses. "
Pamela Meyer
Way
Pause
Reason
" High-stakes lying is out of control. And it's costing us big bucks in one way or another. It's not simply a matter of quantifying losses in dollars. It's costing us emotionally and psychologically as well. "
Pamela Meyer
Lying
Way
Us
" As someone who specializes in deception, I'll tell you this much: When someone insistently implores, 'Believe me,' don't. Pleading 'believe me' or 'trust me' - insisting to people that you are telling the truth - is a tell-tale sign that you probably aren't. "
Pamela Meyer
Trust
Believe
People
" A good lie detector doesn't jump to conclusions but tries to understand the person across the table, her personality, and her motivations. Your goal as a lie spotter isn't to point the finger and say, 'You're lying' - your goal is to get to the truth. "
Pamela Meyer
Good
Goal
You
" Tell the lie over and over and over. It's an art that Trump understands well. There's no better evidence than his absolutely false claim that he opposed the Iraq War in 2002. "
Pamela Meyer
War
Evidence
Lie
" When a pointed question is beaten back with an attack or threat of, 'How dare you...' it's a reliable signal that deception is involved. Trump is a master at this. "
Pamela Meyer
Master
Question
You
" Pummeling an answer out of someone never works. You cannot intimidate someone with aggressive language and think they'll be more forthcoming... that's a caricature of interrogation, part of the TV culture of what it looks like. "
Pamela Meyer
Think
Someone
You
" Cultists do not want to admit they have been manipulated by charisma. Nigerian money scheme victims do not want to accept that they had been swindled. To accept those realities is to accept their own faults. Denial of our own weaknesses is something we all suffer from time to time. "
Pamela Meyer
Time
Want
Accept
" Like it or not, we are all liars. Thank goodness. Imagine going through life where everyone is completely honest: 'Those shoes... look like something out of an early Cyndi Lauper video.' 'Your daughter... looks like the spawn of Honey Boo Boo and Elmer Fudd.' "
Pamela Meyer
Life
Honey
Daughter
" The 'problem lies' are the half-dozen or so falsehoods we hear every day that can lead us down the wrong path in our careers, change how we do business, or dramatically influence our personal lives. "
Pamela Meyer
Day
Business
Path
" Deception can cost billions. Think Enron, Madoff, the mortgage crisis. Or in the case of double agents and traitors, like Robert Hanssen or Aldrich Ames, lies can betray our country. They can compromise our security. They can undermine democracy. They can cause the deaths of those that defend us. "
Pamela Meyer
Think
Security
Compromise
" Liars do look you in the eye. They do not always stutter, stammer, blush or fidget. "
Pamela Meyer
You
Eye
Blush
" A liar often smiles subtly while telling a lie; it's an unconscious expression of his delight in getting away with a whopper. "
Pamela Meyer
Smiles
Away
Liar
" Any normal candidate who mocked the disabled or made crude reference to a woman's menstrual cycle or dabbled in 9/11 conspiracy theories would be out of the race. Trump's fans remain. And wait for more. "
Pamela Meyer
Wait
Normal
Race