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" I don't think I see the world in terms of stupid or clever, but in terms of being able to get irony. There's some awful statistic about only 20 per cent of Americans being able to understand irony. "

Douglas Coupland

Clever

Stupid

Think

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" I like being surrounded by good ideas. Every single time you walk past something you like, you get a blast of happy chemicals to the brain, and I like that. "

" Soon it won't be the Internet any more, it'll just be like air, like somehow they'll integrate the Internet into the air. And God's name will have ended up being 'Google,' because that's the way it worked out. It could have worked out that God's name ended up being 'Yahoo,' of course, but they lost out. "

" Bespoke tailoring: yes! I found this one pair of pants - they're Canali - and brought them into a tailor and said, 'Clone these, dammit.' They just do all the right things. I've got eight pairs in different colors and I never have to think about pants again. The only look otherwise that suits me is, like, the Professor from 'Gilligan's Island.' "

" I'm pro-forwards. Do I want the Seventies to come back? No. The haircuts were terrible. Everyone stank. The food was awful. "

" I'm not a hoarder, I'm a collector: if you have something you like, every time you see it, you have a little happy hit. "

Douglas Coupland

Little

See

" There's much to be said for feeling numb. Time passes more quickly. You eat less, and because numbness encourages laziness, you do fewer things, good or bad, and the world's probably a better place for it. "

" With Google I'm starting to burn out on knowing the answer to everything. People in the year 2020 are going to be nostalgic for the sensation of feeling clueless. "

" I have to say, 'Pod' was a bon-bon, a treat to myself. A treat to write: a happy, pleasurable write. "

" I had a lot of really terrible advice early in my writing career and I cheesed off people without even knowing it, all the while thinking I was implementing good advice. "

" It's a cliche, but true, that writing is intensely solitary and at times really lonely. I sit in one room and talk to squirrels and blue jays all day. "

" I know it's not cat food, but what exactly is it that they put inside of tinned ravioli? "

" The advent of cellphones may, in the end, be no more relevant than the ability of laptops to change our written documents into ones using cool new fonts. "

Douglas Coupland

New

Ability

" The capacity for not feeling lonely can carry a very real price, that of feeling nothing at all. "

" The one thing about my life that's different from others is that I wake up for no one, and for some reason, that's just good for your creativity. "

" Sometimes failure isn't an opportunity in disguise, it's just you. "

" The modern economy isn't about the redistribution of wealth, it's about the redistribution of time. "

" You spend a much larger part of your life being old, not young. "

" Royalty is either going to do very well with cloning, or it's going to disappear completely. "

" What if God exists except it turns out he doesn't really like people very much? "

Douglas Coupland

People

What If

" My life is neither a disaster nor supernatural, yet it is an unlikely event. "

" Feeling unique is no indication of uniqueness. "

" Once you establish a look, and once everybody recognizes that look as your look, you never have to think about fashion again. "

" Storytelling is ultimately a creative act of pattern recognition. Through characters, plot and setting, a writer creates places where previously invisible truths become visible. Or the storyteller posits a series of dots that the reader can connect. "

" You can get a subjective and highly factual dossier on most anyone in the public realm almost instantly. It's why publishers don't worry about author photos any more; people just Google a person and get on with things. "

" In Canada, we're happy to provide a safe haven for next-door neighbors in the middle of a marital dispute. And if anyone trips while crossing the border, we're happy to set their broken bones for free. "

" As a form of escapism, yearning for the 20th century is understandable, but in practice it would be horrible - sort of like going on a holiday promising yourself you could go without the Internet, only to crumble and walk in a daze to the local Internet cafe to gorge on connectivity. "

" Self-delusion is one of the funniest things there is. "

" We're rapidly approaching a world comprised entirely of jail and shopping. "

" Twinkies are more natural than most TV-interview shows. "