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" I remember asking my mum when I was about 13, 'Why are my brothers and sister so much older than me?' And she just said, 'You were a mistake.' And I laughed. "

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" I think I'm pretty self-aware. "

" I like flying to New York from London. It's like a day off for me. No phone or e-mails. Food, wine, iPod, movies, snoozing. "

" Fame is an upshot of what I do. If you're a successful comedian or actor, then you're a famous one. But it's not the driving force. It's a by-product. "

" I like the ironic pomposity of a stand-up comedian. Like all those comedians thinking they can bring down Coca-Cola. They forget to be funny. "

" Stupidity without malice isn't horrible; some people can't help it. "

" With the Internet era and social media and politics being so out there with the lies, now you've got people denying things they're on camera doing, and then you've got people not really caring about the truth. You've got people supporting people who've done horrific things, but just don't want the other side to get any satisfaction. "

" What makes 'Derek' a different kind of sitcom - if it is even a sitcom - is its sincerity. "

" I'm an optimist. "

" I always do a little bit of improv. I did some of 'The Office,' a tiny bit in 'Extras,' a bit more in 'Derek.' "

" I'm a scientist at heart, so I know how important the truth is. However inconvenient, however unattractive, however embarrassing, however shocking, the truth is the truth, and wanting it not to be true doesn't change things. "

" I'm influenced by those '40s, '50s, and '60s films: things like 'The Apartment' - I was a big fan of Billy Wilder. "

" I find comedy easy, and I find drama exciting and tantalising. "

" When I was about to be famous, I feared it on a few levels. I feared it because I didn't want people to lump me in with those people who'd do anything to be famous. I didn't like the word 'celebrity.' I feared intrusion, you know? Make me famous, and suddenly you can go through my trash bins. "

" I am myself sometimes, and I do state my opinions, but not in a comedy routine and not in my character. There always has to be some sort of layer to it. "

" As an artist, you want as many people as possible to see your work with no interference. And usually, I've gone onto fringe channels: BBC Two, HBO, Channel 4. "

" I'm a fang-toothed, blob-nosed, slouchy slob. "

" You can laugh at anything. It depends on the joke. "

" I do the Golden Globes because they say I can say what I want. I wouldn't have that at the Oscars. "

" Science is constantly proved all the time. If we take something like any fiction, any holy book, and destroyed it, in a thousand years' time, that wouldn't come back just as it was. Whereas if we took every science book and every fact and destroyed them all, in a thousand years they'd all be back because all the same tests would be the same result. "

" There's nothing wrong with being respected by your peers. There's nothing wrong with trying to do your best. There's nothing wrong with success. There's not even anything wrong with trying to get a raise. There's nothing wrong with that. "

" I think all art - even one as lowly as making jokes about celebrities - is there to make a connection. "

" I see my real job now as - never mind 'The Office,' 'Extras,' film career, Emmys - I want everyone in the world to know who Karl Pilkington is. "

" I am not a wolf in sheep's clothing, I'm a wolf in wolf's clothing. "

" There are no Hollywood stars speaking out for the elderly. They're forgotten, bewildered, and I don't think it's because people are cruel or don't care. It's because you don't want to think about your own mortality. I think people don't talk about it enough. "

" Free speech is one of the most important things to me, but I think it gets confusing when it comes to offense. Because for one, just because you have the right to say anything, it doesn't mean you have to. "

" I was very protective of my privacy. I didn't want people to write bad things about me that weren't true, because that's just not fair. Fifty percent of everything written about me is wrong. "

" If I've only got a career if I bring David Brent back, you can have it. "

" I've avoided doing a network comedy, because I wouldn't get my own way. Even though it would get more viewers, it wouldn't be mine. "

" Everything I do is somehow rooted in humanity. It's always about people; it's always about ego. It's always about desperation. It's quite existential. You know, 'Am I leading a good life?' That might be because I'm an atheist, and I think this is all we've got, so you better be nice. And have fun. "

" I don't know why other people are concerned about other people's lives that much. "