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" If you see me doing a new stand-up special, it probably means I've been out of work for a while. "

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" For us as writers, it's really important to have songs we believe in - even before sometimes we shoot a scene. If we have a song that's so perfectly designed for a scene on 'Rescue Me,' we'll play it on loud speakers during the shooting. It helps the cameraman and it helps the director, and it helps the actors know what the feel is. "

" Where I grew up, the basketball courts were rarely used. "

" Wolfhounds helped kill off the wolves in Ireland. "

" Nobody can make more fun of me than I already make of myself. "

" I will not bond. I will not share. I refuse to nurture. "

" I actually like talking. "

" I'm a lapsed Catholic in the best sense of the word. "

" I write what I think is funny and I write from a sense of popping a balloon or a sense of injustice, whether it's about yourself, or whether it's about something else. It's my worldview; it doesn't mean that everybody has to agree with it. "

" I think we're going to carry the 'Ice Age's up to 'Ice Age 15,' which means basically they'll be in the present decade. "

" Good actors, especially when they know their character, will come in and either tell you in advance that they have an idea, or in the middle of the rehearsal or the scene they'll let it loose and you go, 'Ah that's great.' "

" I'm not really a Spider-Man fan. I'm more of a Batman guy. "

" First of all, I have to have trucks because I live most of my time on a horse farm, so I've gotta have trucks. It's in the northeast; I've got to have pickup trucks to move snow, number one. Number two, just if I'm driving, I don't have to have an SUV, but I want a big car. "

" I'd love to play in a Red Sox game. It would be so awesome to actually walk out on the field and play, just for one inning. I'd also steal everything I could get my hands on in the clubhouse, which is why they won't let me do it. "

" I wanted to be a hockey player. Where I grew up, the basketball courts were rarely used. I was terrible in school and actually said, 'I'm going to be a hockey player.' "

" Usually when you watch a film, you're just sort of biting your nails about things you could have done differently. "

" I believe in prescription drugs. I believe in feeling better. "

" When I'm on stage, that's me. It's blown up, but that's me. "

" The best comedy audiences in the country and this is tried and true, I'm not just saying it, in my opinion are Boston, Atlanta, and Chicago. "

" No woman can be completely happy at any one moment in time. They're always anticipating the next thing to argue or complain about. "

" Stand-up comedy and comedy in general is the ultimate form of free speech, because you get to poke holes in all the pretentious bubbles politicians and pundits and popes and pretenders try to float over our heads. "

" People saying, 'Life didn't turn out the way I wanted it to.' Welcome to the club. I wanted to be the starting center-fielder for the Boston Red Sox, for chrissakes! "

" Anthony Mackie in 'The Hurt Locker' is everything an actor can hope to be. So rock steady in his portrayal that you immediately forget every performance he may have previously given, and focus only on the character in front of you. "

" My nieces and my nephews think the only thing that I do is 'Ice Age.' That's fine with me because pretty soon they'll grow up enough to realize that I suck or that my time has passed, whichever it might be. "

" I love Santa Monica and Venice because I like the beach. I have a lot of friends in that area. "

" One thing that's great about firefighters: If they don't have the equipment they desperately need, they don't have the help, they don't care. They'll do it on their own. "

" My cousin Jerry Lucey and five other firefighters died in a warehouse fire in Worcester, Mass. - my hometown - right in the middle of our old neighborhood downtown when a homeless couple started a fire to keep warm and the entire building went up. My cousin died trying to save homeless people who had already left the building. "

" When I go to Batman movies, I always think, 'Man, I would like to be a bad guy in a Batman movie.' especially as they got darker when they go to the Christian Bale era. "

" What's politically correct a lot of times is not funny. "

Politically Correct

" I bought my daughter a Chihuahua and I fell in love with it. So now I carry Coco around with me all the time. "

" I really want to do a western film. It's one of my favorite movie genres of all time. "