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" I'm a fan of people getting together. "

Ellen DeGeneres

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" I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beautiful animal. There you go. I think my mother is attractive, but I have photographs of her. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" I just feel like every kid is growing up too fast and they're seeing too much. Everything is about sex, and that's fine for me. I'm not saying I don't like it. But I don't think it should be everywhere, where kids are exposed to everything sexual. Because they have to have some innocence; there's just no innocence left. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" I say always follow your passion, no matter what, because even if it's not the same financial success, it'll lead you to the money that'll make you the happiest. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" The only thing I really recommend, if you're starting out in stand-up is to not try to copy anybody else. You can be influenced by people. I was influenced by Steve Martin and Bob Newhart and Woody Allen, but I never tried to be someone else. I always tried to be myself. And the reason people are successful is they're unique. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" Usually, I wear tennis shoes because my feet are flat, and it hurts to wear anything other than shoes that are cushiony. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" I never buy a house thinking that I'm going to sell it. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" I'm sure there's somebody out there who doesn't like Betty White because she's short and has white hair. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" I still have the shirt I wore my first time on Johnny Carson's show. Only now I use it as a tablecloth at dinner parties. It was very blousy. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" I'd like to be more patient! I just want everything now. I've tried to meditate, but it's really hard for me to stay still. I'd like to try to force myself to do it, because everybody says how wonderful meditation is for you, but I can't shut my mind up. So patience and learning is the key. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today and we don't know where the hell she is. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" There would be nothing to get me to run for president. I don't even understand how anyone would want that job at all. Although I would be able to play golf which I don't seem to have time now. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" When people show me clothing that seems very, very feminine, it's hard for me to embrace that, because it just doesn't feel like me. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" I get bored easily, so I need to do a lot. I've started a record label, so I get to nurture new talent and talk about music, which is a passion of mine. I've written another book. And I get to come to work and do the TV show, which is always really fun. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" I've been trying to find women writers for my staff for a while now and I have three women on my staff and three guys so it's pretty equal. I don't know why that is. It's been the same thing for a while. It's hard for female comedians to stand out. That's weird. That's a shame. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" I learned compassion from being discriminated against. Everything bad that's ever happened to me has taught me compassion. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" If we're destroying our trees and destroying our environment and hurting animals and hurting one another and all that stuff, there's got to be a very powerful energy to fight that. I think we need more love in the world. We need more kindness, more compassion, more joy, more laughter. I definitely want to contribute to that. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" I was raised in an atmosphere of 'everything's fine.' But as I got older, I was like, 'Well no, everything's not fine. There is stuff that's sad.' I am a really sensitive person. I think I am too sensitive sometimes. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" I have an amazing team; I have amazing producers; I have amazing writers, but at the end of it, it's me making the decisions on the writing, the tone, the editing. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" People are constantly asking Portia and me if we are going to have children. We thought about it. We love to be around children after they've been fed and bathed. But we ultimately decided that we don't want children of our own. There is far too much glass in our house. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" The stand up, everything was accidental. I never grew up and was the class clown and had to get the attention. It was - it really is, I have a career despite myself. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" We focus so much on our differences, and that is creating, I think, a lot of chaos and negativity and bullying in the world. And I think if everybody focused on what we all have in common - which is - we all want to be happy. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" The world is full of a lot of fear and a lot of negativity, and a lot of judgment. I just think people need to start shifting into joy and happiness. As corny as it sounds, we need to make a shift. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" I was coming home from kindergarten - well they told me it was kindergarten. I found out later I had been working in a factory for ten years. It's good for a kid to know how to make gloves. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" I know that every time I list something that I am, I am potentially alienating a whole group of people. Publicists and managers will encourage you not to say what political party you belong to, what you eat, what you don't eat, who you sleep with and all that stuff. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" A kid should be told that you can have feelings. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" I collect old portraits. They're all just interesting pictures of people, and you just kind of wonder who they were and what they were. There's a guy - I don't know who he is, but he's wearing a suit. He's got his arms folded, and he looks like he sold insurance or something. I'm just wondering why someone painted him. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" I do like men and I had, you know, a guy in high school that I wanted to marry desperately. He's the mayor of some small town in Texas. I could be the mayor's wife right now. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" So many people prefer to live in drama because it's comfortable. It's like someone staying in a bad marriage or relationship - it's actually easier to stay because they know what to expect every day, versus leaving and not knowing what to expect. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" For some reason, we can't just enjoy somebody else's success. Somehow, that's going to affect us. If they have more, then I have less - and I don't know why. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" Sometimes you can't see yourself clearly until you see yourself through the eyes of others. "

Ellen DeGeneres