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" I'm down for adventure and up for anything. "

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" My grandma was a church organist for 40 years, and she got me into jazz music and great songwriters, Harold Arlen, George Gershwin, all those folks. I can't do it, but I have a profound respect for it. "

" I use an electric wheelchair because I have no sense of balance, and muscle spasticity has arched my spine like a cat's, while my legs are really just for show. "

" The only two characters I can play convincingly are myself and a dumber and sweeter version of myself. "

" Even the most embarrassing mishap can be spun into comedic gold. "

" I don't subscribe to the idea that if you don't have the body you want, you can't be proud of the body you have. I think you can do both. "

" Over the years, I learned that in my career, unlike in life, sometimes my wheelchair is its own automatic door opener. I was able to win the OWN competition by applying one simple principle: be funny, and admit you suck before anyone else can call you out on it. In other words, make the narrative of your failure a comedy. "

" Over the years, I've learned that a sense of humor is the only skill that allows you to turn sucking at life into a career. "

" Religion is something we don't talk about, and it is used by uneducated people as a weapon to divide us as opposed to connect with each other. "

" Most people are really dedicated to doing good things. "

" I want to make sure that people know that I can only be myself - I can't be a spokesperson for people with disabilities, because everybody has a completely different experience. I'm glad that I'm able to inspire parents to see one way to deal with it, but at the same time, I tell a lot of dirty jokes. "

" I think you can feel good about yourself at any size and any shape. Nobody should be made to feel inferior because they have a certain body type. "

" My stance has always been that my issue compared to everything else going on in the world is really, really small. Once you realize that, you can get a lot more out of being a part of the solution. "

" My grandmother was a church organist, but we only went on Easter and Christmas Eve sometimes. "

" For me, cerebral palsy wasn't the biggest deal, because I always had it. You know, you always work with what you got. "

" I have one of the worst voices in the history of recorded time. "

" People tend to treat people with disabilities sort of like they're aliens from another planet. It doesn't come from a bad place; it comes from a place of, 'I have no idea what this disability entails, and I don't want to offend anyone or make them feel awful.' "

" My family is weird in a very good way because I was always exposed to the arts. "

" Religion is such an important part of so many people's lives, and I don't understand it at all. "

" It's ridiculous that we are in a place where we feel like we can classify and dismiss certain groups of people just because of the way they look, or we have these standards of health - like, cellulite is something you need to get rid of. No, it isn't. It's just a part of people's bodies. "

" When I get real excited, my muscles go into spasm, so they just shake. "

" When I got my Oprah money, the first thing I bought was a really nice electronic bidet toilet seat. "

" When people think of me, I want them to think of a travel show host who's really funny and good at his job, and I think eventually the CP won't even play into it, or at least that's the goal. "

" I want to find a way to speak to the broadest audience possible. "

" It's amazing how many companies aren't really in tune to the needs of different travelers. There's just so many embarrassing situations that you go through when you travel. You have to have a sense of humor about it and take it in stride. My whole approach is to embrace spontaneity. "

" There's no denying it: I was a crappy baby who failed his way into this world, and I've been making the best of it ever since. "

" Even when something sad or tragic happens, I find a way to look at it in a positive light. People who don't have a sense of humor must be so sad all the time. "

" I was basically the person at Disney World that was in charge of clearing the park when it was closed... I was the guy... telling them to 'get the hell out and have a magical day.' "

" When I was five years old, I auditioned for the role of 'Tiny Tim in A Christmas Carol.' "

" A lot of the time, when people meet someone in a wheelchair, or with some disability, it's the first thing they notice, but they don't know how to react. "

" My best advice to anybody who has a child with a disability is to really find the tools for that person to thrive and find what their true passions are, because the rest will follow. "