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" Is the raggle-taggle Brangelina tribe any more bogus than that of the landlocked yummy mummy who believes that she can drop half a dozen brats and still keep a modest carbon footprint? I don't think so. "

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" And call me a pig, but isn't it brilliantly refreshing how early the Dutch eat dinner? When they're still laying out the cutlery in achingly hip Barcelona, they're hanging the Closed sign on the restaurant doors of old Amsterdam. "

Julie Burchill

Early

Restaurant

Dinner

" Gluttony and idleness are two of life's great joys, but they are not honourable. "

" Can I just say here how much I hate the word 'pamper'? While pretending to celebrate and indulge women, it actually implies that their bodies are so revolting that even their 'me time' must be dedicated to turning them into living dolls if potential suitors are to be prevented from running screaming in horror. "

" It is also interesting to note that the original supermodels are now making a comeback after being dismissed in the Nineties as being 'greedy' by a gaggle of male designers who lived like Sun Kings. "

" As a kid, I grew to define what I didn't want my life to be like by sitting behind moaning women on the bus, hearing them bang on about their aches and pains, both real and imagined. "

" I am not one of those fat birds who feels miserable because models are thin. Frankly, I feel more insulted by the idea that unless I see other fat birds in fashion magazines, I will be reduced to a sniveling wreck of a human being. "

" I've always thought of beauty therapy, 'alternative' treatments and the like as the female equivalent of brothels - for essentially self-deceiving people who feel a bit hollow and have to pay to be touched. "

" I wouldn't know how to fool a man any more. My deceiving days seem so long ago. "

Julie Burchill

Days

Fool

" Whenever I am sent a new book on the lively arts, the first thing I do is look for myself in the index. "

" I'll declare my own interest right here at the start and admit that, like the vast majority of people, I find youthful looks appealing. "

" As with most liberal sexual ideas, what makes the world a better place for men invariably makes it a duller and more dangerous place for women. "

" I just have a real problem with people who seek to portray fatness or thinness as moral concepts. "

" I am firmly of the opinion that women who make a lot of effort to hang onto their looks in middle age (unless they are beauties, entertainers or prostitutes) are rather sad, as one should surely have something more substantial to recommend one by this time, such as kindness or cleverness. "

" Knowing that the 'Sex and the City' chicks now rack up almost two centuries between them, why do some of us fuss and hiss about a bit of retouching on their forthcoming film poster? "

" Being a monarchist, and fawning over those 'above' you, you must naturally despise those 'below' or on the same socioeconomic level as yourself, because that is how hierarchy worship works. "

" It's very hard to imagine the phrase 'consumer society' used so cheerfully, and interpreted so enthusiastically, in England. "

" As I get older I think, contrary to modern assumption but in line with the old Lerner and Lowe song, that it would actually benefit both them and society if - to quote Professor Higgins - a woman could be more like a man. "

" A therapist might suggest my generosity is a way of buying affection. But buying people's love has never been an issue for me. Generally speaking, I don't want their love. "

Julie Burchill

People

Love

" Rachel Cusk's books are like pop-up volumes for grown-ups, the prose springing out of the page to bop you neatly between the eyes with its insights. "

" The truth of the matter is, beauty is a specific thing, rare and fleeting. Some of us have it in our teens, 20s and 30s and then lose it; most of us have it not at all. And that's perfectly okay. But lying to yourself that you have it when you don't seems to me simple-minded at best and psychotic at worst. "

Julie Burchill

Best

Truth

" Women, more often than not, do things which aren't remotely relaxing but are all about preening, which is just another sort of work. "

Julie Burchill

Work

Women

" As I have got older, I have found myself making friends with the ease and swiftness that other people pick up fuzzballs on their jumpers. And I believe it is probably my lack of longing for 'The One' that makes me so popular. "

Julie Burchill

People

Myself

" I almost choke on my popcorn when I hear film stars, who walk on red carpets as much as the rest of us do on zebra crossings, criticising youngsters who crave fame. "

" The allegedly 'classy' magazines often seem to be in an endless, undeclared competition to see who can climb furthest up the fundament of Gwyneth Paltrow or Jennifer Lopez. "

Julie Burchill

Competition

See

" Big women do themselves a disservice when they attempt to become the Righteous Fat (the Righteous Thin are bad enough, all that running around and sweating, somehow believing it means anything). "

" One Christmas build-up tradition, however, has totally bypassed me - that of going up to town and 'doing a show.' "

" But just think what a boring, bread-and-milk world this would be without the boastful. "

" A woman who looks like a girl and thinks like a man is the best sort, the most enjoyable to be and the most pleasurable to have and to hold. "

" When a man wants to relax, he will slob out and really relax. Or he will pursue a hobby - anything from building models to watching sport. "

" The Feminist Me says that a woman's right to her own body should be inviolate at all times, free from fear of peeping paps. "

Julie Burchill

Fear

Body