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" It's odd because some actors are very scared of comedians. "
Robert Webb
Some
Scared
Odd
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" My childhood was as heavily gendered as any you would find in a working-class household in Lincolnshire. "
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Working-Class
Childhood
Any
" When the Mac ad campaign was in full swing, I quickened my pace as I went past certain bus stops. My wife told me that she loyally took a piece of chewing gum off my nose once. "
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Past
Swing
She
" I spend far too much on taxis. Now, if anyone suggests we get the Tube I say, 'The Tube! I'd forgotten about that.' "
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Too Much
Forgotten
Far
" I've been sort of coasting on 'Peep Show.' So now it's kind of, 'When I grow up, I'm going to have to be an actor if I'm not careful.' "
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Grow Up
Grow
Actor
" I'm knackered. I'm knackered all the time. My stupid, tiny children wake me up at 5:48 A.M. every single morning. "
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Up
Children
Me
" My mother died when I was 17, and I moved in with my dad to make a 12-month pig's ear of retaking my A-levels. "
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Make
Pig
Dad
" I did 'The Frank Skinner Show,' and they gave me a little jukebox-shaped CD player, which looks nice in the kitchen. "
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Little
Kitchen
Show
" UKIP trades in the language of fear and division; it seeks power in order to reject responsibility. "
Robert Webb
Fear
Language
Power
" I suppose if I went to Turkey - I mean, I can't imagine going that far away, but if I did go to Turkey, yes, I would probably try to know 'please' and 'sorry' and 'thank you', and 'a beer please', and all the useful words. "
Robert Webb
Sorry
Thank You
You
" Ambiguity around ambiguity is forgivable in an unpublished poet and expected of an arts student on the pull: for a professional comedian demoting himself to the role of 'thinker', with stadiums full of young people hanging on his every word, it won't really do. "
Robert Webb
Student
Professional
People
" My parents' marriage was already shaky when I came along. They split up when I was five, and I didn't see Dad all that often after that - four or five times a year. "
Robert Webb
Year
Along
Marriage
" If I told my 18-year-old self that one day I'd have a sitcom and a sketch show on TV, I think he'd just drum his fingers and go, 'When? How long is that going to take?' "
Robert Webb
Sketch
Think
Self
" I can't imagine getting bored with comedy or thinking comedy is beneath us suddenly. "
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Imagine
Us
Thinking
" The female characters in 'Peep Show' are not 'strong': they are idiots. As idiotic as the men. "
Robert Webb
Strong
Men
Idiots
" The strength of 'Peep Show' has always been that that it's quite traditional, but it's obviously presented in a very new way. "
Robert Webb
New
Way
Strength
" We are people, individuals comprising a variety of sexes, races, shifting sexualities and all the rest of it. Every convention that tries to reinforce this difference is a step back. Notions of gender pointlessly separate men from women, but also mothers from daughters and fathers from sons. "
Robert Webb
Step
People
Gender
" Labour is at its best when it remembers its moral fury. "
Robert Webb
Fury
Remembers
Moral
" Mum was an amazing parent and my best pal. The tragedy of it, really, was that she died from breast cancer just as I was becoming a man, aged 17, and we were just starting to speak as adults. She was snatched away, and it felt cruel. She made me laugh. "
Robert Webb
Breast Cancer
Amazing
Best
" I don't care where you went to school. There - have I made your day? No? All right, I'll go further: I also don't care what your dad did for a living or how your mum voted. Nor do I mind whether you ate your tea in front of the telly, dinner at the kitchen table, or supper in the dining room. "
Robert Webb
Tea
School
Dinner
" I'm the guy who spends 15 minutes staring out of the window wondering what to have for lunch. "
Robert Webb
Who
Window
Staring
" Very bad things follow when we kid ourselves that we're naturally rational, rather than the more humbling truth: naturally emotional. "
Robert Webb
More
Bad
Emotional
" He likes 'Confetti,' and he doesn't like 'Star Wars.' I think that just relieves us from the burden of ever having to take Mark Kermode seriously again. "
Robert Webb
Think
Burden
Star
" Where you have 20 people who all share roughly the same educational and life experiences, they're going to come up with the same solutions to the same problems. "
Robert Webb
People
Life
You
" I had a friend at college who took being poor very personally. He started showering in the sports centre next door and said he wasn't going to pay for the hot water in our flat any more because he didn't use it. He made me and my other friend pay the bills on our own. "
Robert Webb
Me
Sports
Water
" Religion is many things, but one of them, surely, is a way for adults to indulge in uncritical hero worship. "
Robert Webb
Hero
Worship
Religion
" Do I wake up every day and thank God that I live in 21st-century Britain? Of course not. But from time to time, I recognise it as an unfathomable privilege. "
Robert Webb
Day
Time
Live
" Slow, skinny, and an utter countryside coward: I lived in dread of nettles, spiders, and the very sound of a wasp. As a victim, I was beneath the dignity of the bullies in my year but fair game to the ones in the year below. "
Robert Webb
Game
Dignity
Coward
" When I was 15, if Stephen Fry had advised me to trim my eyebrows with a Flymo, I would have given it serious consideration. "
Robert Webb
Eyebrows
Me
Serious
" I'm good at finding things to do on my own, even if it's just reading. "
Robert Webb
Reading
Good
My Own
" I think jokes can actually go to places that drama can't. "
Robert Webb
Jokes
I Think
Drama