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" I've been doing stand-up since I was 15 years old. "

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" Truth be told, ginormous portions have become a pet peeve of mine. "

" Other kids would sneak out of the house to go to parties and do untoward things. I was sneaking out to do standup downtown. It paid off. "

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" I'm named after a computer and grew up really interested in them. "

" If I could sew comedy and philosophy together, then I've done a good job. The primary goal is always going to be laughs and the secondary goal is always going to be saying something without it being a lecture. I think it's important to have substance for what you're saying. "

" You would not believe how much time people waste in a day. And how little time they put into things they genuinely love. "

" I like struggle. "

" All musicians need a day job in the beginning. Unless they still live with their parents, I guess. I'm just lucky that my day job is simply another form of art. "

" The name 'Charmageddon' actually comes from a social technique that I use. Which is, you know, literally obliterating people with charm so that you can get away with saying stuff that no one else could ever get away with, you know? "

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" Growing up in Kentucky, I used to hang out with four running buddies as a kid - 6, 10, and 11 years old. Two of them would later come out, and so 50 percent of my friends as a kid were gay. "

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" 'Cold Case Files' and similar shows do bang up business, which points to a certain thirst for details in the viewership, but it seems like all the news chat shows continue to force the myth that Americans can't stand detail and have no interest in an idea that can't fit on a bumper sticker. "

" I've always said that I benefit, as an actor, from not having the illusion of security. "

" I'm as heterosexual as any person need be. I'm open about my relationships - or lack thereof - in my own life, because I want to make the case that gay isn't contagious. It's not something that you can catch or learn or choose. "