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" I've found over the years that for some reason, people either are big fans and have to use me, or they don't quite understand what I'm doing. "

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" It's more fun in a way to do ensemble scenes, where you know your background, you know the scene, but you can't prepare because someone else is going to say something that is going to lead you off. "

" I did a show called 'Lois & Clark' - it was about Superman - years ago. They wanted someone to play the president of the United States. The plot was the president got kidnapped by a group, and they made a clone of him, who was very irresponsible and silly. "

" The 'Tim And Eric' experience was very strange. "

" My father passed away when I was 12, so it was very difficult. But I was always the class clown. I don't know why - maybe as an escape. But then I was sent away to military prep school. "

" Comedy is harder, because if there's no laughs, it's pretty bad. But drama, if there's no reaction, you can say, 'Well, it's not their cup of tea. Maybe it's too heavy for the audience.' "

" In most cities, it doesn't cost much to put your own show on a local access channel, so you get all sorts of strange stuff on the air. "

" I love sketch; it's my favorite form. But if it's all improv, they're either very good, and it's annoying how good they are, and it makes you feel bad, or they're not too good; then you're sweating for them. "

" I am re-collecting the baseball cards my mom had thrown out when I went away to school. You know you are an adult when you can buy a whole set of baseball cards instead of two packs at a time. "

" As an actor, and as you get to a certain level... and it's pilot season and you read the trades, you could have a nervous breakdown. 'So-and-so's signed for a pilot. Why aren't I?' "

" Bob Balaban is so perfect that the first movie I did with him, I couldn't talk to him because I was so intimidated by him. "

" There's different kinds of improv. There's Second City improv where you try to slowly build a nice sketch. There's stuff you do in college coffee houses where you just go joke, joke, joke. Bring another funny character with a funny hat on his head. Christopher Guest is more the line of trying to get a story out. "

" I like to play the guy that has no self-awareness. "

" Because I started my career in improv, performing with Second City and the Ace Trucking Company, I always enjoy being in situations where - as an actor - you have to think fast & be light on your feet. "

" Kids can relate to having some scary person living near their house. They can relate to, 'Hey, don't go near that house.' We all can. "

" I just admire everybody and sit in awe and watch them. "

" I guess the essence of my comedy is to get into a very abnormal situation but act like it's normal. "

" I used to collect autographs outside of the old Cleveland Stadium. I can still remember everyone who took the time and spent a few minutes to make your day. That sticks with you. "

" I've never crossed over to be a big star. I'd like to be in a big $100 million movie, though. 'Cause I was in an 'Austin Powers,' I think I had two lines, and every once in a while, I get a check, a really nice check, for that movie. "

" One of the first shows I ever did was 'Laverne & Shirley.' I played this sleazy guy that came into town with a friend and was going to date Laverne and Shirley, but we really wanted to get into the bowling alley because it was next to the bank we wanted to rob. "

" A great director is someone who makes you feel like you're moving forward. "

" Comedy always came easier for me. But I would have loved to have been an action hero. "

" God bless Chris Guest... and I mean it sincerely. "

" 'Field of Dreams.' Definitely one of the best baseball films of all time. When Kevin Costner spoke to his dad, and his dad answered, I, um, I mean a lot of guys I know couldn't help crying. "

" Tobe Hooper - he did my favorite horror movie, 'Texas Chain Saw Massacre.' It's still one of my favorite horror films. "

" I love to draw, although I wish I was better at it. "

" When you think about accountants, who would want to be an accountant? But, what would we do without accountants? Whether it's soldiers or garbage men or doctors, everyone has the thing that they love. "

" I've always wanted to be on a soap opera. "

" My stepfather was a military man: he was in the Air Force. Reserve. You thought he'd seen front-line action, but he was stationed in Cleveland. "

" After working with Wayne Brady, Colin Mochrie, and Jonathan Mangum, I said, 'I am never going to talk about improv again.' "

" When we need a policeman, God bless 'em, they're there. But, if you're in the wrong place at the wrong time, everything seems suspicious. "