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" I've just found out there are pages on the internet dedicated to whether I'm gay or not. "

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" As an actor, being on autopilot is the worst thing possible. "

" I grew up babysitting and always enjoyed it. I love family. A couple of my closest friends have kids, and I'm their godfather, and that's one of my greatest pleasures in life, just picking them up from school and hanging out with them. "

" I would like you all to give me a round of applause as I have not crashed my car in over 15 months. "

" There are two ways to go when you hit that crossroads in your life: There is the bad way, when you sort of give up, and then there is the really hard way, when you fight back. I went the hard way and came out of it okay. Now, I'm sitting here and doing great. "

" I know Chandler is similar to me. But if you watched my life for a week, there would be many more boring parts. "

" I certainly like the rumour that I was the father of Elizabeth Hurley's baby. It made me think I could impregnate women in a different way to everyone else. Elizabeth and I were never alone in a room together, so I must be a very powerful man indeed. Actually, I'm thinking of suing the baby! "

" I need a woman to have a quirky sense of humor. There's a bunch of jokes I use, and if she doesn't get them, she's probably not for me. "

" In high school, my prom date fooled around with another guy - on prom night! "

" Ninety percent of video game AI really is pretty damn bad. I think that's actually why it's so much fun to shoot things. Because the AI is so bad and the characters are so annoying. "

" If there's a silence in a room I'll try to fill it as soon as humanly possible. "

" There are two sides to being pigeonholed. There's, 'Oh, no, I'm going to be Chandler for the rest of my life,' but there's also the fact that getting to play Chandler opened up doors to me. It's now my job to find things that shake it up a little bit. "

" I got sober because I was worried I was going to die next year. "

" It's not foreign for me to be talking about my problems in circles. "

" To me, writing is remembering something funny that happened, or maybe something I said seven years ago. "

" Well, I was lucky enough to be involved in about 19 failures at an early age, so I'm realistic about the success I'm having and how quickly it can go away. What's important is to be smart about it. "

" That's like the greatest experiences of my life still, 'Friends,' so it's not something I want to get away from, but I do want to try and show something new. "

" Like, my house has a nice view, because, you know, I was on 'Friends.' "

" I gravitate towards sort of broken characters who try to be better people. "

" To be a comedian, you have to have some darkness behind it. I certainly draw on my past, and it helps. "

" If I could walk into the 'Friends' audition again and go or not go, I have to say it's 50-50. "

" I would love to have kids one day. In fact, I'm pretty good with them. I grew up with five half-siblings, the youngest of whom is 11 years younger than me, so I think I learned some pretty cool parenting skills quite early on in life. "

" Vicodin, I got addicted to that little pill. The reason I don't talk about it too much in the press is because it isn't funny, and I love to be funny in interviews. If you joke about that period in your life, it doesn't seem right. "

" I've certainly had a lot of experiences in my life where I was much too self-centered. "

" In a perfect world, my tennis game gets better. I have kids and a beautiful wife and live on some hill somewhere that's not in Los Angeles. And the script that Tom Hanks just barely turned down gets in my hands. "

" Women always think that I'm Chandler, so if I don't joke around for half an hour, they think that something's wrong. Then I explain that I don't have comedy writers scripting everything I'm saying at this particular dinner. "

" I've been accused of not really paying attention to a sentence unless my name comes up in it twice. "

" When I die, I'd like' Friends' to be listed behind 'helping people.' "

" I became a big Kings fan, and then later on my hometown of Ottawa got a team, so then I was very, very torn. I just love both of those teams very much. "

" When I was, like, 15, I realized there could be a career in making people laugh - like, you could get paid to do it. That was insane to me. "

" My feeling on therapy is it's a luxury, and if you're fortunate enough to get some smart people to talk to about life, then that's fortunate and you should go for it. "