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" Me shooting 40% at the foul line is just God's way to say nobody's perfect. "

Shaquille O'Neal

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" We want to win. We want to win big. We want to win the whole thing. "

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" Someday I might have to put down a basketball and have a regular 9-to-5 like everybody else. "

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" When you're in championships, it's never about what you do. It's always about what other people do. "

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" I've always been a leader. Every team I've played on, I've led my way. "

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" Our offense is like the pythagorean theorem: There is no answer! "

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" When you flop, that's just another message that you don't know how to play me. Stand up and take your medicine like a man. "

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" When I get old, I'm going to the old folks' home. I don't want to be one of those guys who's hanging around the house bothering the kids. But not just any old folks' home. I want the whole top floor. "

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" I'm very excited about my new agreement with the Heat. This contract allows me to address all of my family's long-term financial goals while allowing the Heat the ability to acquire those players that we need to win a championship. "

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" As a youngster, my mother and father always drilled into my head having something to fall back on. My father was kind of funny. I'd score 40 points. I'd come home and say, 'Look dad, I scored 40.' He'd never have a smile on his face. He'd be like, 'I saw that move you did. What if you'd hurt your knee?' "

Shaquille O'Neal

" There is no answer to the Pythagorean theorem. Well, there is an answer, but by the time you figure it out, I got 40 points, 10 rebounds and then we're planning for the parade. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" When I tweet, I try and accomplish three things. One, is to make you laugh. Two, is to inform you. Three, is to enlighten you. That's all I do. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I do what I do. Always. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I play against a front and a back every night, Ming does not have to do that, Duncan does not have to do that, Garnett doesn't do that. I am the only one that has to do that. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" My father made me who I am. He gave me a basketball and told me to play with the ball, sleep with the ball, dream with the ball. Just don't take it to school. I used it as a pillow, and it never gave me a stiff neck. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" And I want to do it the right way, like everybody else, not just a famous figurehead that gets a job because he is a famous basketball player. I want to really learn the business. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" Donald Trump is a great friend, and he has four or five Picassos on his plane. And that's where I would look at them. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I just want to keep people entertained. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" Art is a process of delivering or arranging elements that appeal to the emotions of a person looking at it. It's what you feel. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" This is a tough game. There are times when you've got to play hurt, when you've got to block out the pain. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I want to be known as 'The Big Shakespeare.' It was Shakespeare that said, 'Some men are born great, some achieve greatness, some have greatness thrust upon them.' "

Shaquille O'Neal

" We live in an impatient world. Everybody is always looking for the next big Kobe, the next big LeBron, the next big Twitter. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" The best quality about Kobe Bryant? You want me to be honest? I don't know. I'll tell you why. I open my arms to everybody. But he never stepped forward for the embrace. So I never really got to know him. I don't know anything about him, and it's kinda sad. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I'm very educated and can give you somewhat of a vocabulary, but I don't get to the philosophical side. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I'm like tax. You're going to pay one way or the other. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I'm a mama's boy above all. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I've met a lot of artists who wanted to paint me. LeRoy Neiman was one. He did it from a photograph. He made 20,000 copies, and we sold them all. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" Because I'm so big, you have to look at me. I think of myself as a monument. But sometimes I like to feel small. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" I am the number one Ninja and I have killed all the Shoguns in front of me. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" Every time I do something silly, it comes off really funny because it's natural. "

Shaquille O'Neal

" Kids can still call me Shaq, but adults should call me Dr. O'Neal. "

Shaquille O'Neal