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" My work's never been accepted by my family, but it's something I'll always carry on with. "

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" You know, there's that temptation in interviews to make yourself sound - well, to give yourself a bit of mystery. "

" I couldn't be 'Johnny' in front of a camera in acting jobs and behind the camera I like to be 'Michael.' With directing, you can't do it by halves. There's a lot of reflection, and I have found that I, as 'Michael,' thrive on it. It's lovely coming home and feeling that stuff from a day's work as myself. "

" I avoid any kind of organised trips as that's one of my bugbears. "

" I'd never experienced stress before I did stand-up, and it was a massive shock to my system, this thing of waking up, and the nerves of, 'You're on stage tonight.' "

" People are always asking, 'Where does Michael Pennington end and Johnny Vegas begin,' and you're going, 'It's not like that: it's blurred right across.' "

" Some comics are in it for what they can get out of it. Others are in it for a love of comedy. I think those that are in it for a genuine love of comedy find each other within the circuit and become friends. "

" We all have days where we can't pronounce things or give it the emotion it deserves. "

" I actually enjoy being heckled; it keeps it interesting, and I think it is a nice feeling for people once they have left the show. "

" Class still matters in Britain today. "

" From a certain age, I sort of accepted myself for what I was. And although to other people it was like nothing ever goes right, I had a really nice attitude that I'd inherited from my parents, and especially from my dad. "

" You don't want to be flattered and become big-headed by getting awards. But, well, I am. "

" I'm loath to use my personal life to promote what I do, but at the same time, I don't like a journalist going away with no more than you could get off Wikipedia, where most of it's invented anyway. "

" I sang 'American Pie' a lot in my stage set. It had a knack of uniting an audience in a sing-along. It's a clever song about American history but wrapped in a fantastic tune. "

" There's this idea that it has to be made in London. But we've got everything up here, and if you've got comics who are gifted because of where they're from, you shouldn't drag them away from that natural resource. "

" I had a massive amount of self-belief when I did stand-up. "

" I've got my finger in a lot of pies. "

" I am a big fan of smelly cheeses but the rest of the family don't seem to be particularly keen on them. "

" I love the way my weight fluctuates in the newspapers. It was 18 stone and then people look at a bad picture of me and add a few more stone on. I think the highest was 22 stone. "

" There was always that thing with 'Johnny' - I always saw myself as his writer and PR. But when he got out there, I had no control. His whole thing was going off on those flights of fancy. Going, 'Let's see what we can possibly do that hasn't been done before up here.' And when it works, it's lovely; it's a great night. "

" This autocue was obviously written for someone else and I've been brought in at the last minute. "

" My agent once said, 'You're not very driven.' And it's true. I'm not the type to ring up and go, 'Get me this part!' "

" 'Johnny' was always a lone wolf when he got on stage. Him against the world, whereas suddenly, when I got into acting, people were relying on me. "

" If you write, produce and direct, you own things and see them through to the end. "

" The cheese board is my big treat at Christmas that I have to deny myself during the rest of year. "

" I think if you're at the point where you're popular enough to sell your wedding photos to OK! Magazine then you don't need the money. "

" My forte is playing drunks down the ages. When my agent rings me about a role, I don't ask what the part is, but what century it's in. "

" There have been times I've finished a big job and thought, 'Great, a couple of weeks off.' But then a couple of weeks turns to three weeks and then after a month you're staring at the phone willing it to ring. "

" Being 'Johnny' was almost like an out of body experience. I thought he was just a character that I'd created and could quite easily step away from, but it was much more difficult than that. "

" Baldness is visually enough of a stigma as it is without a big sweaty bloke on stage pointing it out. "

" I've been offered all the reality TV shows but have turned them down. If I did it as 'Johnny,' there'd be no jungle left! It was really hard regaining control of myself, so I am reluctant to let 'Johnny' back out of the box. "